The Satirical Political Report

"The Best Political REAM
on the Internet."



February 7th, 2014

Chris Christie Enlists Ben Stein to Attack Wildstein’s High School Record

chris christie

“Not only do I not know what David Wildstein was doing in high school, but I understand he didn’t even attend class.”

http://media4.s-nbcnews.com/j/streams/2013/April/130417/1C6963224-ss-110805-teachers-beuller.blocks_desktop_medium.jpg

Wildstein? Wildstein? Are you playing hooky with Bueller?

February 2nd, 2014

Chris Christie Helps Seahawks Win Super Bowl

Chris Christie

FORGET RICHARD SHERMAN, IF THE SEAHAWKS REALLY WANT TO CONTROL PEYTON MANNING, I KNOW EXACTLY HOW TO SHUT DOWN SOME OF HIS PASSING LANES.”

RICHARD SHERMAN AND PEYTON MANNING

 

January 29th, 2014

GOP’s SOTU Response: Ms. Rodgers Channels Mr. Rogers

Cathy McMorris Rodgers

Cathy McMorris Rodgers

“IT’S A WONDERFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD, A WONDERFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD … AND THAT’S ABOUT ALL WE GOT!”

January 26th, 2014

Huckabee Now Attacks Showtime’s Libidinous ‘Masters of Sex’

“I’VE NEVER ACTUALLY SEEN THE PROGRAM, BUT I’M DISGUSTED BY THE FACT THAT THE OBAMA ADMINISTATION IS PERMITTING AN ENTIRE SHOW ABOUT A GUY MASTURBATING HIS JOHNSON.”

January 20th, 2014

Chris Christie Also Misuses ‘Sandy Funds’ for Latest Commercial

new jersey stronger than the storm

“I MAY BE HOLDING NEW JERSEY AND SANDY FUNDS HOSTAGE, BUT MY GOAL IS TO PROVE THAT I’M STRONGER THAN THE SHITSTORM.”

January 18th, 2014

Christie’s Bullying of THIS Mayor Could Really Prove His Downfall

Mayor McCheese

“THE GOVERNOR TOLD ME THAT UNLESS I ENDORSED HIM, AND GAVE HIM A FREE LIFETIME SUPPLY OF BIG MACS, HE WOULD HAVE MY DRIVE-THROUGH LANES PERMANENTLY SHUT DOWN.”

chris christie

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Mark Karlin of BuzzFlash at Truthout — Make Wealthy Pay Social Security Taxes on Their Full Salaries.

 

December 12th, 2013

Secret Message of ‘Fake African Signer’ Finally Decoded

Photobucket

“HE WAS OBVIOUSLY TRYING TO ‘SIGN’ A FAKE ORGASM, BUT HE COULDN’T EVEN FAKE THE ‘FAKE SIGN’.”

Story here.

 

November 26th, 2013

Corporations with Religious Rights? Here’s the Inevitable Result

Lawrence O'Donnell

Lawrence O’Donnell

“TODAY, A CORPORATION RUN BY FUNDAMENTALISTS, WHO OPPOSE DANCING AS DEVIL’S WORSHIP, CLAIMED IT HAD THE RIGHT TO STOP ITS EMPLOYEES FROM EVEN USING THE RHYTHM METHOD.”

Story here.

November 20th, 2013

On 50th Anniversary, Tea Partiers Blame Kennedy Assassination on Obamacare

Larry Klayman of Freedom Watch

“NEVER MIND THAT KENNEDY WAS GUNNED DOWN 50 YEARS AGO, THIS JUST SHOWS THE LASTING IMPACT OF OUR ‘SINGLE BULLSHIT’ THEORY.”

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Elizabeth Warren: Social Security Should Be Enhanced, Not Cut – by Mark Karlin, Editor of Buzzflash at Truthout.

 

November 6th, 2013

The Ad Campaign Dems SHOULD Have Run Against Chris Christie

http://www.nbc.com/app2/img/1280x720xR/video/NBCdotCOM/fddf818c039c2087301abf87a47f9d37_1d1fe5ba2c63cc21c7b2c3f6fc5c1d22.jpg

“NOW IF YOU VOTE FOR ME, CHRIS CHRISTIE, EVEN A YEAR FROM NOW, TWO YEARS AFTER SANDY… YOU’LL STILL BE LIVING IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER.”

Story here.

More Christie humor, at All Hat No Cattle.

Mark Karlin of BuzzFlash at Truthout: Median Wage Falls to Lowest Level Since 2008, As Top Incomes Soar.

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