“IF I OFFEND THE RIGHT WING BASE OF MY PARTY, THEY’RE LIKELY TO CHALLENGE THE LEGITIMACY OF MY ‘HATCH CERTIFICATE’.”

Story here.

“Senator Graham, in response to your questions about the Second Amendment, and whether the right to own a gun is fundamental, let me be clear:

“I mean, I wanna, I wanna kill.  Kill.  I wanna, I wanna see, I wanna see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth.  Eat dead burnt bodies. I mean kill, Kill, KILL, KILL.”  And if my ankle wasn’t broken, I’d be jumpin up and down yelling, “KILL, KILL,” and “KILL.”

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From GOP Crashes, to Mashups, at BartCopE!

“THE ONE THAT REALLY INFLUENCED ME WAS WHERE THE PROSECUTOR DELIBERATELY FRAMED AN INNOCENT MAN, HAD HIM SENT TO THE ELECTRIC CHAIR, AND THEN HAD HIS DEFENSE ATTORNEY, PERRY MASON, BEAT UP SO BAD … THAT HE WAS PERMANENTLY DISABLED.”

Story here.

“NOW, JUDGE, WE HAVE REPORTS THAT YOU’VE HAD THIS REPETITIVE DREAM, WHERE YOU’RE LATE TO COURT, WITHOUT ANY CLOTHES ON, AND CAN’T FIND THE COURTROOM … AND STILL YOU PROCLAIM THAT YOU CAN MAKE A ‘WISER’ DECISION THAN AN OLD WHITE JUDGE.”

“KEITH, WHILE YOU’D HAVE TO EAT A WHOLE BAG OF ‘WISE POTATO CHIPS’ TO GET SICK, EVEN A SINGLE SERVING OF JEFF SESSIONS WILL DO THE TRICK.”

1. In West Side Story, were you rooting for the Jets … or the Sharks?

2. Will you refrain from using “Latin” in your judicial opinions? 

3. In I Love Lucy, who would you say was “wiser”: a LATIN MALE  bandleader, or a goofy WHITE FEMALE who always wanted to play the Copacabana?

4. Do you think First Amendment rights were trampled when NBC was intimidated into pulling repeats of the Seinfeld Puerto Rican Day Parade episode?

5. Do you promise not to hang fuzzy dice from the bench, or to wear a “No. 51″ on the back of your robes in support of Puerto Rican Statehood?

“THE TRANSCRIPTS SHOW JUDGE SONIA SOTOMAYOR FREQUENTLY USED WORDS LIKE HABEAS CORPUS AND STARE DECISIS – NEXT THING YA’ KNOW, SHE’LL CLAIM THAT THE GREAT FOUNDATION OF WESTERN CIVILIZATION, THE MAGNA CARTA, WAS WRITTEN IN LATIN.” 

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Colbert on Guns in National Parks, via One Good Move.

How Jack Bauer Can Help Bring Single-Payer Health Care to the United States, by Chad at BuzzFlash.

Lisa Casey with more on the “Parade” of Liars.

Glenn Greenwald at Crooks & Liars on Obama’s Support for the Graham-LIeberman Secrecy Act.

“SENATOR, WHEN AN IMMIGRATION CASE COMES BEFORE ME, I THINK ABOUT MY OWN IMMIGRANT ANCESTORS, AND THE FACT OF HOW DIFFERENT THAT WAS … BECAUSE THEY WERE WHITE.” 

“MAY IT PLEASE THE COURT, I’D RATHER HAVE MY CASE JUDGED BY A WISE-ASS LATIN CARTOON CHARACTER … THAN A SO-CALLED ‘CONSERVATIVE’ WHO ONLY WANTS TO CONSERVE THE CORRUPT CORPORATE POWER STRUCTURE.”

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Meg White at BuzzFlash: MSM and Right Wing Groups Team Up to Profit From Supreme Court Nominee Story

One Good Move with one of Bill Maher’s Best New Rules, including a riff on ”Greed ain’t so good.”

Paunchest Pilate at All  Hat No Cattle.

“I’VE NOT ONLY DRESSED THE PART, BUT I ALWAYS HANG IN THE SOUTH BRONX AT YANKEE STADIUM, WOLFING DOWN THE RICE AND BEAN BURRITOS.”