“IF MURROW HADN’T MADE HIS SCURRILOUS ATTACK ON JOE McCARTHY IN THE ’50′s, TODAY CHINA WOULD BE A U.S. PUPPET, WE’D STILL HAVE STAY-AT-HOME MOMS, AND KIDS WOULD BE EXPERIMENTING WITH HULA HOOPS INSTEAD OF DRUGS.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Based on the latest polls, BuzzFlash’s P.M. Carpenter laments The American Electorate: From Dingbats to Dingoes.  

Palin and Religion; Need something, just pray — at One Good Move.  (God help us!)  

Madkane’s sneak peek at Sarah Palin’s Barracuda Blog.

“EVERY INSTINCT I’VE EVER HAD FOR MODERATION AND COMMON-SENSE HAS BEEN WRONG; NOTHING’S EVER WORKED OUT FOR ME IN THE GOP.  SO NOW, I’M GOING TO DO THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE — INSTEAD OF RATIONALITY AND THE ENLIGHTENMENT, I’M GONNA GO WITH BIBLE-THUMPING AND NEANDERTHAL KNOW-NOTHINGNESS.”

“HI, I’M JOHN McCAIN, I’M IGNORANT AND I LIVE IN THE 13th CENTURY.  AND I ACCEPT YOUR NOMINATION FOR PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.”

“JOHN McCAIN IS CHICKEN-SHIT SALAD … THE OPPOSITE OF EVERYTHING THIS COUNTRY SORELY NEEDS.”

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From an old classic to New Rules — Norm Jenson has Bill Maher’s latest.

Juan Cole on McCain’s choice of Palin as cynical and dishonorable, from a conservative GOP woman.

“SARAH PALIN PROVES THAT A WOMAN CAN FALL AS LOW AS A MAN IN TERMS OF BEING A RIGHT-WING, KNOW-NOTHING, BOOK-BURNING NEANDERTHAL IDEOLOGUE, WHO DISPUTES GLOBAL WARMING, AND HYPOCRITICALLY DENIES OTHERS THE VERY PRIVATE FAMILY CHOICES THAT SHE CLAIMS ARE HER OWN BUSINESS.”

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Lisa Casey shows how Palin can “do it all.”

McCain-Palin: Disrespect on Parade, by P.M. Carpenter at BuzzFlash.

Staying on message, Five Reasons Republicans Are Evil, at One Good Move.

Madkane on Bailin’ On Palin?

Anti-Jewish Terror is “God’s Judgment” — from the Palin Theological School, via Andrew Sullivan.

                        JAMES DOBSON 

“THE SECRET IS THAT THE NORTH VIETNAMESE ONLY BROKE HIS ARM, WE THREATENED TO BREAK HIS CAMPAIGN.”

“I WOULD ALSO TAKE THE SAME POSITION WITH A SQUIRREL, BUT IF IT WERE RUSSIAN SPIES, THAT’S WHERE I’D HAVE TO DRAW THE LINE.”

“HOW DO YA’ THINK I GOT ELECTED IN THE FIRST PLACE … I’M ACTUALLY RELATED TO HALF THE STATE OF ALASKA.”

“ELEMENTARY, MY DEAR WATSON. SIR McCAIN HAS SO MANY HOUSES, THE DOG DID ‘BARK,’ SINCE HE DIDN’T EVEN RECOGNIZE HIS OWNER.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Norm Jenson has Bill Maher on Larry King — on Religion, and Politics.

Lisa Casey on the end of the Bush Error.

Madkane has Some Friendly Advice For Obama.

“THEY DON’T CALL ME ‘HOLY JOE’ FOR NOTHING. I FIGURED IF I WAS GOING TO BE A ‘BENEDICT ARNOLD’ TO HELP AN OLD, OUT-OF-TOUCH GUY WHO OPPOSES ABORTION, I MIGHT AS WELL GO FOR THE REAL ‘BENEDICT’.”

While recent media attention has understandably focused on the widespread desire for political change, a new poll also reveals deep-seated anger with God’s performance, with large majorities now favoring a change in the position of “Supreme Being.”

The survey, conducted, appropriately enough, by the Pew Poll, reveals that by more than a two-to-one margin, Americans feel that the Universe is on the wrong track, there is no light at the end of the Black Hole, and that the Sun may not even come up tomorrow.

While most respondents still blame the Bush Administration for the invasion of Iraq and the mismangement of the war, an overwhelming 77% held God accountable for the sectarian strife between Sunni and Shia sects, deadly natural disasters such as earthquakes and hurricanes, and the inability to buy a six-pack of Budweiser before noon on a Sunday.

A barely sober Christopher Hitchens, appearing on Charlie Rose, gloated that “I’ve been telling you that God is Not Great.”

Reached for comment, God responded by saying, “Look, I’ve been doing this job for more than four billion, err… I mean six thousand years, so I don’t think there’s anyone else with enough experience to wreak havoc on the world, with the possible exception of John McCain.”

Perhaps not surprisingly, a majority of poll respondents were also against the idea of Jesus succeeding the Holy Father, citing “Bush 43″ as an example of what can happen when a “son takes over.”

Huge majorities were also receptive to the idea of term limits for God, with proposals ranging from “Two Millennia,” to the more stringent “two-year terms” of U.S. Congressmen.

A spokesperson for Hillary Clinton denied that she was prepared to throw her hat into the ring. However, Bill Clinton was captured on YouTube telling a reporter that “this is the crack in the ultimate ceiling that Hillary and I have been waiting our whole lives for.”

In anticipation of new elections for God, jockeying for position among the States has already started, with delegations from Iowa and New Hampshire asserting their time-honored right to go first with their caucuses or primaries. In contrast, small-town Pennsylvanians are making the case that those who are most bitter and cling to God, should also go first in voting for God.

There is also speculation that that agnostics and atheists, particularly those located in Florida and Michigan, will be granted, at best, only a 1/2 vote.

In addition, a proposal to utilize Diebold’s election machinery is running into stiff resistance, for fear that the next God may end up being Pat Buchanan.

But in perhaps the ultimate sign of hunger for radical change at the top, a whopping 89% of respondents stated they were even willing to “take a chance” on a “Black God.”

UPDATE: God’s Response.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Obama’s Evangelical Connections, at BuzzFlash.

Lisa Casey on the “Vote for McCain.”

New York Magazine on the ‘Fall and Rise’ of Hillary Clinton.

Dan Kurtzman presents Best Humor of Campaign 2008.