BY THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

A PROCLAMATION

“That on the 20th day of January, A.D. 2009, at 12 o’clock noon, all persons enslaved to the MAN-CHILD George W. Bush within any State, District or Territory of these United States shall be then, thenceforward, and forever free to reap the benefits of rationality, science and the Enlightenment; and the executive government of the United States, including the military and naval authority thereof, will recognize and maintain the freedom of such persons from the oppression of the GOP and their twin ideologies of crony capitalism and theocratic repression.”

“IT’S NOT THE ORIGINAL INTENT OF THE FRAMERS, BUT THE INTENTIONS OF THE EDITORS OF THE TEXAS LAW REVIEW MANUAL ON STYLE. THAT’S WHY WE FEDERALIST SOCIETY CONSERVATIVES BOLDLY GO WHERE NO JUSTICE HAS GONE BEFORE.”

Norm Jenson has the story on the Chief Grammarian and the Oaf of Office.

There once was a man from Texas 
Who gave new meaning to “reckless” 
A shameless corporate whore 
Who ginned up a War
He would’ve been better off Dick-less

“OUR INTELLIEGENCE ALSO SHOWS THAT THE SONUVABITCH’S WHEELCHAIR WAS POWERED BY YELLOW CAKE URANIUM … FROM AFRICA.” 

“LAURA WOULDN’T LET ME RIDE MY MOUNTAIN BIKE AROUND THE CAPITOL, SO I FIGURED I’D STEP ALL OVER BARACK’S BIG MOMENT.”

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Lisa Casey on Bush’s Parting Gift to Obama.

Apoliticus with a George W. Bush Revisionist Retrospective.

“I GOT ALL THE GAY MEN IN ONE ROOM, ASKED THEM TO STRIP DOWN, AND IF THEY WERE ABLE TO WEAR THE DOUGHNUTS I PROVIDED, I HOSED ‘EM RIGHT DOWN.”

Story at HuffPost

“UNNERSTAN’, HE’LL STILL BE GIVIN’ THE INVOCATION — HE’LL JUST BE GIVIN’ IT IN DRAG.” 

“I’M HOPING RICK WARREN WEARS MY NEW LINE — ‘EVENING GOWNS BY 9/11′.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Jon Perr weighs in on Warren with Obama’ Achilles Heel.

Lisa Casey on the Bush Untouchables.

Mocking Bill O’Reilly, at One Good Move.