“THIS IS IN COMPLETE ACCORD WITH THE ORIGINAL INTENT OF THE U.S. CONSTITUTION, AS WELL AS THE CLASSES I TOOK AT “XENOPHOBE LAW SCHOOL FOR FOREIGN STUDENTS.”

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Speaking of so-called compromise, Bill Berkowitz at BuzzFlash reports on The “Civility Project”: Evidently, the Tea Partiers breaking up Town Hall meetings aren’t listening.

“I’M NOT AT ALL OFFENDED. IN FACT, I’M HAVING LADYSMITH BLACK MAMBAZO SING ANOTHER SONG FOR ME ON MY BIRTHDAY: ‘PEOPLE SAY THEY’RE CRAZY, I’VE GOT WING-NUTS ON THE SOLES OF MY SHOES’.”

“UNDER THE OBAMA HEALTH PLAN, YOU CAN EXPECT TO RECEIVE AFRICAN SPAM ASKING YOU TO SEND YOUR VITAL ORGANS TO AN ORGAN BANK, IN EXCHANGE FOR GOVERNMENT-RUN HEALTH INSURANCE.”

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BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin on the Creeping Signs of GE Intervention in MSNBC’s Progressive Programming.

Dan Kurtzman with Bill Maher Bashing the ‘Birthers’ Over Obama Birth Certificate.

“JUST BRING YOUR GASBAG REPUBLICAN REPRESENTATIVE TO THE LOCAL CAR DEALER, NO QUESTIONS ASKED. AND WE WON’T EVEN REQUIRE PROOF OF THEIR AGE THROUGH THEIR BIRTH CERTIFICATES.”

“HURRY UP, WE’RE BETTER OFF RISKING OUR LIVES WITH THE MEXICAN DRUG CARTELS, AND EVEN CHANGING OUR CITIZENSHIP, THAN ANSWERING A LIBERAL BLOGGER’S QUESTION.”

Mike Stark with Birthers on the Hill.

“I CAN’T PRODUCE THE ACTUAL BIRTH CERTIFICATE, BUT I CAN SHOW YOU A ‘CERTIFICATE OF IN-BRED INSANITY,’  WHICH ALL WE ROYALISTS HAVE.”

“THE ONLY THING WE COULD VERIFY WAS THAT EVEN IN THE GARDEN OF EDEN, ADAM HAD FULL MEDICAL INSURANCE, WITH NO DEDUCTIBLES OR CO-PAYS, TO COVER THE COST OF RIB REPLACEMENT.”

“WE ALL KNOW THAT BARACK OBAMA DIED BACK IN THE 60′s, ON ABBEY ROAD, AND WAS REPLACED BY THE RADICAL PEACENIK PAUL MCCARTNEY — WHO’S BEEN DISGUISED IN BLACKFACE EVER SINCE.”

“A PRESS RELEASE JOINTLY ISSUED BY THE TWO GROUPS POSES THE QUESTION: ‘HOW COULD OBAMA’S MOTHER POSSIBLY HAVE GIVEN BIRTH IN HAWAII, WITHOUT FIRST FALLING OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH’?”

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P.M. Carpenter at BuzzFlash on the slaphappy birth of the Birthers, and Madkane addresses Dear Senator Inhofe on the issue.

“UNDER THIS NEW LEGISLATION, ALL RIGHT WING ‘BORN-AGAINS’ RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT WILL HAVE TO PRODUCE … TWO DIFFERENT BIRTH CERTIFICATES.”

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Norm Jenson with Bill Maher – the best New Rules ever?

Bill Moyers and Michael Winship at BuzzFlash: Obama’s Health Care Struggle — Waterloo or Water Down?