The Satirical Political Report

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February 12th, 2010

GOP Senator Puts a Hold On the Earth’s Rotation

“NOW, AHM NOT ADMITTIN’ THE JUNK SCIENCE THAT THE EARTH ACTUALLY ROTATES, BUT AH WILL KEEP THIS COUNTRY IN DARKNESS UNTIL MY HOME STATE COMPANY IS AWARDED THE FEDERAL LIGHT BULB CONTRACT .”

February 3rd, 2010

Forget Dems and Rethugs, Obama to Take Q&A From Jedi Council

“NOW, WE GOTTA’ ASK OURSELVES,  IF WE  CAN PUT A COUNCIL  ON SUCH PLANETS AS OSSUS, ALDERAAN AND CHANDRILA, WHY IS IT WE STILL CAN’T PASS TRULY UNIVERSAL HEALTH INSURANCE.”

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Staying with  “Star” themes, Norm Jenson on Obama as Star Trek’s Spock.

Last holy alliance between Rush and Sarah? — via Lisa Casey.

BuzzFlash’s Interview with Liberal Radio’s Bob Kincaid.

BartCopE! with the Sublime Prime Time Programming’ Edition.

January 30th, 2010

GOP Calls for Rematch, With Obama’s Cardboard Cutout

“WE’LL STILL GET OUR ASSES KICKED, BUT AT LEAST WE’LL GO HOME WITH A SOUVENIR WE CAN SELL ON EBAY.”

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Lisa Casey on another dividebetween U.S. and Chinese Executives.

January 29th, 2010

GOP Demands OBAMA Retreat at GOP Retreat

“NO, I DID NOT HONOR YOUR DEMAND THAT I BRING YOU POLAND SPRING WATER.”

November 17th, 2009

Chinese President To Obama: YOUR Country Needs a Cultural Revolution!

“IT SEEMS TO ME THAT IF YOUR COUNTRY IS TO MAKE A GREAT LEAP FORWARD, IT NEEDS TO BIND THE FEET OF PALIN, BECK AND LIMBAUGH, AND THEN STUFF THEM IN THEIR OWN MOUTHS.”

November 17th, 2009

What Right Wing REALLY Wants From Obama on Asian Trip

“YOU BRING SHAME UPON THE UNITED STATES BY YOUR TRADE SURPLUSES AND CURRENCY MANIPULATIONS….  NOW YOU MUST DIE!”

September 14th, 2009

Wall St. Reform? Gordon Gekko Offers Obama a Deal

Barack Obama

“MR. PRESIDENT, WE’LL SUPPORT YOUR PLAN FOR A PUBLIC OPTION, AS LONG AS WE CAN SECURITIZE IT, DERIVATIVIZE  IT, AND TRADE IT AS OPTIONS … AND THEN SELL WHAT’S LEFT AS ‘SUB-PRIME HEALTH INSURANCE’ TO THE SAME POOR SHMUCKS WHO BOUGHT OUR WORTHLESS MORTGAGES.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Lisa Casey on The Great White Dopes, and BuzzFlash’s P.M. Carpenter on the Great GOP Freak Show.

Juan Cole on the latest chaos in Afghanistan.

September 13th, 2009

The Hypocrisy of George Will’s Constant Refrain That Obama is ‘Over-Exposed’

“NOT ONLY HAVE I BEEN ON TELEVISON EVERY SINGLE WEEK FOR VIRTUALLY THE LAST 30 YEARS, BUT NOT ONCE HAVE I APPEARED AT THE ROUNDTABLE WEARING A PAIR OF PANTS.”

July 31st, 2009

‘Cash for Clunkers’ Program Extended, to Cover GOP Congressmen

“JUST BRING YOUR GASBAG REPUBLICAN REPRESENTATIVE TO THE LOCAL CAR DEALER, NO QUESTIONS ASKED. AND WE WON’T EVEN REQUIRE PROOF OF THEIR AGE THROUGH THEIR BIRTH CERTIFICATES.”

June 19th, 2009

GOP to Obama: Meddle in Iran, Not Here!

“WE BELIEVE THAT THE PRESIDENT SHOULD CONCENTRATE ON A FOREIGN NATION RUN BY THE ‘DEATH TO AMERICA’ THUGS, WHILE WE REPUBLICANS DO OUR BEST TO ACCOMPLISH THAT SAME GOAL HERE.”

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