“WE OPEN WITH A SCENE DURING THE 2000 PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN. AL GORE HITS HIS HEAD ON A LOCKBOX, LOSES CONSCIOUSNESS, AND THEN EXPERIENCES AN EIGHT-YEAR NIGHTMARE OF UNJUSTIFIED WAR, LAWLESSNESS, AND ECONOMIC AND ENVIRONMENTAL DEVASTATION. HEY, IT WORKED IN DALLAS, AND THAT’S PRETTY CLOSE TO WHERE THIS WHOLE FIASCO STARTED ANYWAY. THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS, A SIMPLE SHOWER WON’T WASH AWAY THE STENCH OF THIS ONE.”

“NOW, WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HILLARY’S FIRST PRIORITY IS TO REVISIT BOSNIA, TO GET EVEN WITH THOSE PHANTOM SNIPERS, AND OBAMA INSISTS ON USING HER TO PERSONALLY POLICE THE INDIAN-PAKISTANI BORDER?” 

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Lisa Casey on the “comings and goings” at the White House.

Juan Cole: Pakistani Reaganism Must End: The New Government must take on the Lashkar.

“HERE’S WHERE I GO INTO THE FOUR-CORNER STALL.”

“SINCE I DON’T HAVE ANY KIND OF ‘STIMULUS PACKAGE,’ LAURA ASKED ME TO IMMEDIATELY MOVE OUT OF THE MASTER BEDROOM.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Dave Lindorff at BuzzFlash: Idiots and Bailouts.

Mr. Bond, Move Over for 00-Obama, at All Hat No Cattle.

Juan Cole on the Debate over More Aid, Troops for Afghanistan.

“I DECIDED TO GO WITH ONE OF THE FEW REPUBLICANS WHO COULD ACTUALLY SURVIVE THE ‘VETTING’ PROCESS WITHOUT FLEAS.”

“LISTEN, ABE, IF YOU HAD BROUGHT BILL AND HILLARY INTO YOUR TENT, YOU’D NEVER HAVE GOTTEN ANY SLEEP.”

“BARACK CLAIMED THAT HE WAS PREPARED TO HANDLE A CRISIS AT 3 AM; WELL, THIS WILL BE HIS FIRST TEST.”

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Talk about a real crisis: BuzzFlash on GOP Senators’ Plans to Filibuster Obama Court Picks.

“LET’S FACE IT, THESE GENTLEMEN HELPED END A CIVIL WAR, WHILE IF OBAMA PICKS TOO MANY CLINTONITES, IT MIGHT JUST RE-IGNITE THE ONE WE HAD IN THE 90′s.”

“NOW WE ALL KNOW JOE IS NOT LICENSED TO DO ANY PLUMBING, BUT HE CAN STILL PICK UP A BROOM AND SWEEP THE GARBAGE OUT OF THE WHITE HOUSE.”

“WE’RE LOOKING FOR COLD HARD CASH – WE’VE ALREADY GOT 40 FAKERS AND A FOOL.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin: Obama’s Election is About the Restoration of Democracy, Not Race.

The White House is Lookng Better Already, at All Hat No Cattle.

Bernie Sanders vs Cavuto over Energy Crisis, via One Good Move.

Madkane’s Celebratory Limerick.

Dan Kurtzman has the Best Humor of Election 2008.