The Satirical Political Report

"The Best Political REAM
on the Internet."



September 12th, 2010

Pastor Terry Jones Redirects Hatred Toward Jews, Vows to Burn Hanukkah Candles

“AND JUST TO GET EVEN FOR THE DEMISE OF JESUS, I’M PLANNING TO BURN THESE DAMN CANDLES EIGHT NIGHTS IN A ROW.”

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Jesus takes a different view, at All Hat No Cattle.

Madkane on Apathy, Schmapathy — Dems Still Have To Vote!

Recommended Reads — at BartCopE!

January 27th, 2009

Move Over Lawrence, Make Room for Barack of Al-Arabiya

“LET ME TELL YOU, I WAS SO IMPRESSED WITH THIS NEW AMERICAN PRESIDENT, THAT IT DIDN’T EVEN BOTHER ME THAT HE ‘DOODLED’ A CARTOON OF THE PROPHET MOHAMMED DURING THE INTERVIEW.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

GOP Myth-Making in the Face of Change, by Ann Davidow at BuzzFlash.

Jon Perr also weighs in on the GOP Stimulus Position: Obstructionism Now, Obstructionism Forever.

Juan Cole on the Cole/Marsh Debate on Obama’s Bombing of Pakistan.

January 26th, 2009

Obama Names George Mitchell to Investigate Steroid Use in the Middle East

“WE FIGURE IF WE CAN CUT DOWN ON ‘ROID RAGE IN THE MIDDLE EAST, WE’LL ONLY HAVE A FEW THOUSAND YEARS OF RELIGIOUS MISTRUST AND HATRED TO CONTEND WITH.”

October 22nd, 2008
October 11th, 2008

McCain’s Back-Handed Defense of Obama

“WELL, MA’AM, EVEN IF HE IS A MUSLIM, HE’LL BE UNIQUELY QUALIFIED TO ELIMINATE PORK-BARREL SPENDING.”

July 6th, 2008

Bushies Spy on Obama’s Website, to See Who Opposes Spying

 

“THAT’S THE GREAT THING ABOUT THE INTERNETS; EVEN THOUGH FOLKS USE FAKE NAMES LIKE ‘HANG THE WAR CRIMINALS,’¬† WE CAN STILL TRACK ‘EM DOWN WHERE THEY LIVE.”

Story here; and 

Mark Karlin on the United States as a Radical and Revolutionary Nation.

July 5th, 2008

Liberals Ask Obama: Are We ‘Stuck in the Middle With You?’

Well I don’t know if I voted for change,
I got the feeling that something is strange,
I’m so scared I just might crash my Prius,
And I’m wondering if you’ll really free us,
Bloggers to the left of me,
FOX News to the right, here I am,
Stuck in the middle with you.

Yes I’m stuck in the middle with you,
And I’m wondering what it is I should do,
It’s so hard to keep my ACLU card,
When the FISA bill is such a canard,
Feingold to the left of me, Pelosi to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.

Well you started out with nothing,
And you’re proud that you beat Billary,
But the netroots, they come bawling,
Tell you that you’re “killing me,”
Please…. Please…..

Trying to make some sense of your “faith”,
And your pitch to the GOP base,
Is it wise to tack back to the center,
We don’t want Nader back as our mentor
Bloggers to the left of me, John McSamey to the right,
Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Obama’s Faith-Based Folly, at One Good Move.

Lisa Casey on the “Two George Presidents

Obama Jokes vs. McCain Jokes, via Dan Kurtzman.

Condi Rice Still “Justifying” the Attack on Iraq, at Crooks & Liars.

July 3rd, 2008

Cindy McCain’s Fourth of July Surprise

 

“SINCE MY HUSBAND’S POLICIES ARE SELLING OUT¬†LIBERTY, I THOUGHT I’D BUY HIM THE STATUE OF LIBERTY,¬†WHICH I SIMPLY PUT¬†ON MY VISA CARD.”

But Lisa Casey says Lady Liberty is really Obama’s Gal.

July 3rd, 2008

Wesley Clark Challenges John McCain to a Game of ‘Battleship’

 

“EVEN AFTER I BOMB¬†THAT SONUVABITCH¬†IN HIS A-HOLE,¬†HE STILL WON’T BE QUALIFIED TO SERVE AS COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF.”¬†

 

July 2nd, 2008

The Tell-Tale Sign Gitmo Interrogators Were Using the Communist Chinese ‘Playbook’

 

“IF YOU RUNNING DOGS OF ISLAM DON’T CONFESS TO HELPING CHIANG KAI-SHEK, WE’LL PURGE YOU IN THE CULTURAL REVOLUTION, THROW YOU OFF THE GREAT WALL OF CHINA, AND SERVE YOU¬†PORK LO MEIN INSTEAD OF GENERAL TSO’S CHICKEN.”

HuffPost summarizes the NY Times story.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Crooked Talk Express: McCain on McCain on the Economy– at BuzzFlash.

Lisa Casey reports on the Real Reason for High Gas Prices.

Dan Kurtzman has Best Spoof Videos of Campaign 2008.

Juan Cole on Harry Reid: Coal & Oil are Making Us Sick.

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