“I GUESS I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE THE ‘PROCTOLOGIST TO THE STARS,’ BUT I REALLY DON’T KNOW MY ELBOW FROM MY ASS.”

“IT’S JUST A SHAME HE COULDN’T HAVE APPLIED HIS CHILD-MOLESTING AND PEDOPHILIA TO A REALLY GOOD CAUSE, LIKE THE CATHOLIC CHURCH.”

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The Peter King YouTube video, via Wonkette.

“THE EVIDENCE IS PRETTY CLEAR, YA’ KNOW. THE OUTFIT STRAIGHT OUT OF ‘SGT. PEPPERS,’ THE GHOULISH ZOMBIES ON HIS ALBUM COVERS, AND THE FACT THAT THE COLOR CONTINUALLY DRAINED OUT OF HIS FACE OVER THE YEARS.”

[Editor's Note: If you read this post backwards, while drinking a Shirley Temple upside down, you'll develop a certain urge to play air guitar left-handed while barefoot and clad in a black suit.]

“THE FIRST EPISODE WILL FEATURE A GOVERNOR WHO FIRST CLAIMS HE GOT LOST ON THE APPALACHIAN TRAIL, TRIES TO ACCOMPLISH A WIFE SWAP, AND ULTIMATELY PROVES HE HAS NO GREY MATTER IN HIS ANATOMY.”

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All Hat No Cattle on the sane(?) Saddam Hussein.

And Dan Kurtzman on the insane housewife from Wasilla.

Michael Jackson Mashups, at BartCopE!

“WHERE IN HELL AM I NOW SUPPOSED TO GET MY OXYCONTIN FOR JUST 19.95 … ESPECIALLY WITH THE FREE SHIPPING AND HANDLING THAT COMES WITH BEING ALL OF THE FIRST 500 CALLERS.” 

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Dan Kurtzman with The Week in Political Cartoons.

Lisa Casey on another reason to run in I-ran.

BartCopE on Michael Jackson’s Lament.