“YES, IT’S TRUE I ALSO MET MY ARGENTINE GIRLFRIEND IN NEW YORK, BUT THERE’S NO TRUTH TO THE RUMOR THAT I CROSSED PARTY LINES TO HAVE A MENAGE A TROIS WITH ELIOT SPITZER.”

WaPo with the story.

“UNDER MY PLAN, EACH MALE HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD WILL BE CAPPED AT ONE AFFAIR, BUT WILL BE ABLE TO BUY AND SELL PERMITS FOR EXTRA EMISSIONS.”

“AND IF YOU VOTE FOR REPUBLICANS NOW, WE’LL GIVE YOU THE BEST ‘FAMILY VALUES,’ PLUS RUN THE ENTIRE U.S. GOVERNMENT FOR ONLY $19.95.”

Story at Huffngton Post.

“WHADDYA’ WANT FROM ME; IT’S BEEN OVER 2000 YEARS SINCE I LAST HAD SEX WITH THE VIRGIN MARY.”

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Mark Sanford is BuzzFlash’s GOP Hypocrite This Week – for Trumpeting ‘God’s Laws’ After Lying & Cheating Across the Hemisphere.

Lisa Casey with the Sanford tell-all.

“I FELT THAT CONSULTING WITH SOME VETERANS OF THE THIRD REICH WOULD PUT ME IN THE BEST POSSIBLE POSITION TO BLITZKRIEG TO THE GOP NOMINATION IN 2012.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Lisa Casey on another GOP “frontrunner,” the perpetually-lost Palin.

Norm Jenson with The Colbert Report’s American’s Health Plan-Demic.

P.M. Carpenter at BuzzFlash: Of Obama, mullahs, mischief-makers and miscreants.

Juan Cole asks: Washington and the Iran Protests – Would they be Allowed in the US?

“THERE I AM, JUST MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS, AND OUT OF THE WOODS COMES THIS RABID, HORRIFIC CREATURE, SCREAMING HYSTERICALLY ABOUT FEDERAL FUNDING FOR THE NATIONAL PARKS.” 

“IT’S THE  STORY OF A MODERN-DAY JUNKMAN WHO ABANDONS HIS FOUR SONS ON FATHER’S DAY, IN ORDER TO PULL A DISAPPEARING ACT … SO THAT HE CAN BECOME A WALKING SYMBOL OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY.”

“I’M COMING TO JOIN YOU, ELIZABETH, AND I’LL STILL HAVE MORE CHANCE OF GETTING ELECTED THAN MARK SANFORD.”

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Madkane asks if Mark Sanford Was Just Lost? Or Losing It?, and Lisa Casey figures out the best way to “bail out” the Guv’nor.

“CAN’T A MAN JUST TAKE OFF FOR THE WOODS ONCE IN A WHILE FOR A LITTLE REST AND RELAXATION?”

“TALK ABOUT A REVERSAL OF POSITION – THAT GOOD ‘OLE BOY SUDDENLY WASN’T SO OPPOSED TO A GUMMINT BAILOUT.”

Story at HuffPost.

“THESE PIES ARE BEING MADE FROM HIPPIE COMMUNISTIC ORGANIC APPLES, WHICH ARE PICKED BY ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS, AND WHICH THE ADMINISTRATION PLANS TO DISTRIBUTE AS PART OF THEIR SOCIALIZED MEDICAL PLAN TO KEEP THE DOCTOR AWAY.”

“SO MUCH FOR BI-PIE-TISANSHIP.”

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Bobby Jindal as the New ‘Hoover’, at All Hat No Cattle.

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin: Most Wealthy Liberals Won’t Back Progressive Media.

Dan Kurtzman’s The Week in Political Cartoons

“ZESE REPUBLICANS ARE LIKE CRAZY CYBORGS WITH NO FEELINGS, AND UNLESS VEE GO BACK IN TIME AND MAKE SURE THEY AREN’T BORN, THE WHOLE WORLD, AND NOT JUST CAL-EE-FORNIA, MIGHT COME TO AN END.”