“AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT … THE MINISTRY OF FAT WALKS, A SPANISH INQUISITION TORTURE WITH A BIG MAC, AND AN OBESE LUMBERJACK WHO WEARS WOMEN’S CLOTHES AND HAS SEX WITH A DEAD PARROT.”

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Story and video at Huffington Post

“EVEN THOUGH A LOSS TO JON CORZINE IN THE NEW JERSEY GUBERNATORIAL RACE MAY SIGNAL THE TWILIGHT OF MY CAREER, I’LL STILL BE PREPARED TO … ‘SERVE’ THIS MAN.”

VOICEOVER: “FORGET ABOUT FAT, CHRIS CHRISTIE’S REAL PROBLEM IS ‘GRAFT.’ THAT’S GRAFT, AS IN RHYMES WITH ‘WILLIAM HOWARD TAFT.”