Burning a hole in religious dogma worthy of the Sun, God’s private messages contain his shocking admission that he did not actually create the World — let alone in the storied six days of Genesis. Other documents establish that God is not only not the Master of the Universe, but that he can not even claim to be the Master of His Own Domain.

Other stunning revelations include God’s use of angels to spy on everybody, all the time — collecting such personal information as credit card numbers and bank account and email passwords — which provides a more mundane explanation for the Holy Spirit’s reputation as “all-knowing and all-seeing.”

The heavenly document dump also reveals that while God publicly proclaims that he is on board with the War Against the Devil, God has been secretly supplying Satan with fire and pitchforks.

Other scandalous material shows that God is not only estranged from his own son, Jesus, but has sought to escape the pain of such family dysfunction by smoking dope with Afghan President Hamid Karzai.

But while the religiously observant have been largely mortified by these disclosures, some have taken solace from perhaps God’s most surprising revelation: that even Mohammed wants to bomb Iran.

“THESE CHARGES OF URANIUM ENRICHMENT ARE AS FICTIONAL AS THE HOLOCAUST. IN FACT, MY CHIEF DOOR-TO-DOOR SALESMAN, NAJIBULLAH ZAZI, JUST WON EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH IN THE NORTH AMERICAN REGION.”

“WHILE SEX SCANDALS WERE CERTAINLY THINNING GOP RANKS, A PRECEDENT FOR RESIGNATIONS BASED ON STUPIDITY COULD COMPLETELY WIPE US OUT.”

——————————————————————————————————–

BuzzFlash Editor Mark Karlin asks: How About Independence Day from Corporations Controlling Our Government?

Lisa Casey with the latest on Dick Cheney and Valerie Plame. 

Juan Cole with the latest on Iran: Mousavi Said Calling for General Strike; Hard Liners Call for his Arrest.

“WHERE IN HELL AM I NOW SUPPOSED TO GET MY OXYCONTIN FOR JUST 19.95 … ESPECIALLY WITH THE FREE SHIPPING AND HANDLING THAT COMES WITH BEING ALL OF THE FIRST 500 CALLERS.” 

—————————————————————————————————————-

Dan Kurtzman with The Week in Political Cartoons.

Lisa Casey on another reason to run in I-ran.

BartCopE on Michael Jackson’s Lament.

“I FELT THAT CONSULTING WITH SOME VETERANS OF THE THIRD REICH WOULD PUT ME IN THE BEST POSSIBLE POSITION TO BLITZKRIEG TO THE GOP NOMINATION IN 2012.”

—————————————————————————————————————————–

BLOGWORTHIES:

Lisa Casey on another GOP “frontrunner,” the perpetually-lost Palin.

Norm Jenson with The Colbert Report’s American’s Health Plan-Demic.

P.M. Carpenter at BuzzFlash: Of Obama, mullahs, mischief-makers and miscreants.

Juan Cole asks: Washington and the Iran Protests – Would they be Allowed in the US?

“NOW IF YOU THINK PRESIDENT OBAMA HAS BEEN PERSONALLY INTERVENING IN AREAS THAT HE SHOULD STAY OUT OF …  YOU AIN’T SEEN NOTHING YET!

——————————————————————————————————————–

Staying somewhat on topic, BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin Asks: Is the Seat of Power in the U.S. on Wall Street and K Street, Not in the White House?

GOP duet of MCain and Graham still singing the same old song, at All Hat No Cattle.

Dan Kurtzman on Obama’s Performance at the Radio and TV Correspondents’ Dinner.

“WE’RE THE PARTY OF ‘LAW AND ORDER SCR’ – SUPPRESSING CIVIL RIGHTS.”

—————————————————————————————————————————

BuzzFlash Editor Mark Karlin on how the U.S. Election in 2000 Coulda’ Used a Little ‘Iranian Green.‘

One Good Move with the Daily Show Recap and Colbert Recap.

Dan Kurtzman with The Week’s Best Late-Night Jokes  ]]> http://satiricalpolitical.com/2009/06/20/irans-clerics-insist-they-are-taking-cues-from-us-conservatives/feed/ 0 http://satiricalpolitical.com/2009/06/19/neo-cons-criticize-obama-for-not-pushing-restoration-of-the-shah/ http://satiricalpolitical.com/2009/06/19/neo-cons-criticize-obama-for-not-pushing-restoration-of-the-shah/#comments Fri, 19 Jun 2009 20:59:11 +0000 Don Davis http://satiricalpolitical.com/?p=7504

“WHAT BETTER WAY TO RE-INSTALL A PUPPET REGIME THAN BY LITERALLY PROPPING UP A GUY WHO’S BEEN DEAD FOR ALMOST 30 YEARS.”

—————————————————————————————————————–

On a similar note, Why is Obama Speaking Softly about Iranian Election? Ask North Korea– Analysis by Alyssa Morin at BuzzFlash.

“WE BELIEVE THAT THE PRESIDENT SHOULD CONCENTRATE ON A FOREIGN NATION RUN BY THE ‘DEATH TO AMERICA’ THUGS, WHILE WE REPUBLICANS DO OUR BEST TO ACCOMPLISH THAT SAME GOAL HERE.”

———————————————————————————————————————

Juan Cole: Iran Reformists say they Have Documentary Proof of Fraud.

And Lisa Casey with “graphic proof” of the GOP banana republic.