“I TOLD THAT FAT FUCKER: ‘NEVER GO AGAINST THE  RIVER RAIL PROJECT, OR YOU’LL BE SLEEPING WITH THE FISHES UNDER THE HUDSON RIVER’.”

1. Re-sod Guantanamo.

2. Free sterilization of minorities.

3. All state aid in the form of loans — to be paid back to the “Republican National Committee.”

4. “Jet Stamps” — for corporate CEOs.

5. Expand Electric Grid, to facilitate comeback of the electric chair.

6. Mass transit funds — to deport “illegals.”

7. Tax credits for purchases of semi-automatic weapons.

8. Coupons for conversion of analog TV — to Rush Limbaugh radio.

9. Infrastructure spending — erect ten-story ‘Ten Commandments’ in every state capital.

10. Supplemental infrastructure spending — erect world’s largest solar panel directly over Nancy Pelosi’s office.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Keeping in the spirit, P.M. Carpenter with Naked Republican Goons 33 1/3: The Final Insult, and Madkane says No Quid? No Quo!.

Lisa Casey on the rush to genuflect before Rush.

A worthwhile John Updike tribute, via One Good Move.

Dan Kurtzman’s latest political satire links.

Juan Cole with the early word on the Provincial Elections in Iraq.

“WE’LL CREATE JOBS BY BUILDING SCHOOLS, INFRASTRUCTURE AND THE GREEN ECONOMY IN THE BLUE STATES, WHILE WE GIVE THE RED STATERS JUST ENOUGH TAX RELIEF TO BUY THEIR BEEF JERKY FOR AN ENTIRE YEAR.”