“THE PRESIDENT HAS INDICATED HIS WILLINGNESS TO COMPROMISE WITH THE NEW GOP HOUSE LEADERSHIP ON HEALTH CARE: ALL CHILDREN CAN REMAIN ON THEIR PARENTS’ INSURANCE PLAN UP UNTIL NINTH MONTHS IN THE WOMB … THEN THEY’RE ON THEIR OWN.”

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The Daily Show’s British News Crowndup, at One Good Move.

On Veteran’s Day, the New GI Bill, at All Hat No Cattle.

“WE KNOW THAT EXECUTIVE ORDERS ARE EASILY RESCINDED, BUT IT’LL HURT LIKE A SONUVABITCH FOR OBAMA TO REMOVE A TATTOO OF A FAT F**KER LIKE HENRY HYDE.”

“SINCE EVEN OUR REGRESSIVE POLICIES CAN’T LITERALLY BRING US BACK IN TIME, THE BEST WE CAN DO IS FOLLOW RICK PERRY’S LEAD AND START ANOTHER SECESSION.”

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Funny or Die’s Presidential Reunion, at One Good Move.

Mitt vs. The Talking Hand, at All Hat No Cattle.

“ACCORDING TO MY CALCULATIONS, USING IRRATIONAL NUMBERS, IF THE DEMOCRATS DON’T DELIVER ON THEIR PROMISES BASED ON REPUBLICAN OBSTRUCTION , WE WICKED PISSA ON OURSELVES BY ELECTING THOSE SAME WICKED REPUBLICANS.”

“MR. BROWN, YOU’VE GOT SOME LOVELY DAUGHTERS.”

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Story here.

“IF IT’S GOOD ENOUGH FOR US, EVERY CITIZEN SHOULD HAVE ACCESS TO THE SAME PROCEDURE.”

“OK, YOU CAN EITHER EXERCISE THE PUBLIC OPTION WITHIN THIS TIGHT LITTLE AREA, OR YOU CAN HAVE A LITTLE TOY PUBLIC OPTION.”

“WE’RE PREPARED TO ERECT LEVEES AROUND SENATOR LANDRIEU TO PROTECT HER FROM RIGHT-WING ATTACKS, AND TO ACTUALLY MAKE A GENDER CHANGE TO THE LINCOLN MEMORIAL TO PLACATE THE SENATOR FROM ARKANSAS.”

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BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin on the “Greatest” healthcare system’s need to “erect”  more nurses.

“LITTLE DO THEY KNOW IT, BUT REPUBLICANS ACTUALLY HAVE THE VOTES TO LIMIT HEALTH INSURANCE TO BAD NECKS … AS A RESULT OF CAR ACCIDENTS OR CUNNILINGUS.”

[A summary of last nite's Curb here.]

“IF THE INSURANCE COMPANIES CAN PROVE THEY’VE SOLD ABORTION RIDERS, THEN ABORTED COVERAGE IN CASES OF PREGNANCY, WE’LL THEN CONSIDER GOVERNMENT SUBSIDIES FOR FORCING A WOMAN TO HAVE THE CHILD THROUGH A PUBIC OPTION.”