“I TOLD PRESIDENT OBAMA I’D BE GLAD TO ‘HAVE‘ THEM … WITH FAVA BEANS ON THE SIDE.” 

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Meg White at BuzzFlash: The Murder of Dr. George Tiller is Part of the War Against Women.

Lisa Casey Asks: How can the Dems ever match the GOP?

Juan Cole on Obama and Resolving the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict.

“YA, I TOLD PRESIDENT OBAMA HE CAN CHECK DA’ TERRORISTS INTO ZEE HOTEL CALEEFORNIA ANYTIME HE VANTS … BUT ZEY CAN NEVER LEAVE.”

“WE ALSO HAD TO SUSPEND OUR INTERNET SERVICE AND SELL OUR SOAPBOX, SO IT LOOKS LIKE THE REVOLUTION WILL HAVE TO WAIT AT LEAST ANOTHER GENERATION.”

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Lisa Casey on Congressional con-plicity.

Dan Kurtzman’s The Week in Political Cartoons.

Juan Cole on Obama v. Cheney on Guantanamo, Prosecutions, Torture.

“My fellow citizens. I assumed the office of the Presidency with the best of intentions — to try to change both the culture of Washington, and the way business is done here.

But after just two short weeks, I realized that I was HOPE-lessly naive. That trying to negotiate with the know-nothing Neanderthal, Limbaugh-ass-sucking, tax-cut-a-saurus, fickle-down Reagan-worshipping Rethuglicans, is about as pointless as trying to resuscitate our ailing economy by exporting tea to China.

So here’s the REAL CHANGE I’m now proposing:  

Forget the bank bailouts, we’re gonna use the  remaining TARP dollars to buy up the TOXIC GOP ASSES from Congress.  For far less than the cost of any stimulus package to the Treasury, we’ll put these “bad asses” in a “bad holding tank,” where they can’t do any further damage to this great nation.

I know I promised to close Guantanamo, but it’s clear that the legal system is simply not equipped to deal with these nihilsts who are out to destroy our very way of life. 

But let’s be clear — the WAR ON ERROR will not be won in a year, or even during this generation. We must remain ever-vigilant against these malefactors of great mischief.

And now that I finally did what I had to do to the Rethuglicans, it’s time for a smoke.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin strikes a similar note: Water Doesn’t Trickle Down the Middle of the Road, President Obama.

Dick Cheney’s New Wheelchair, at All Hat No Cattle.

The Daily Show’s  Big ‘Bama’s House – at One Good Move.

Dan Kurtzman’s Political Cartoons of the Week, and Obama the Comedian.

1. Re-sod Guantanamo.

2. Free sterilization of minorities.

3. All state aid in the form of loans — to be paid back to the “Republican National Committee.”

4. “Jet Stamps” — for corporate CEOs.

5. Expand Electric Grid, to facilitate comeback of the electric chair.

6. Mass transit funds — to deport “illegals.”

7. Tax credits for purchases of semi-automatic weapons.

8. Coupons for conversion of analog TV — to Rush Limbaugh radio.

9. Infrastructure spending — erect ten-story ‘Ten Commandments’ in every state capital.

10. Supplemental infrastructure spending — erect world’s largest solar panel directly over Nancy Pelosi’s office.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Keeping in the spirit, P.M. Carpenter with Naked Republican Goons 33 1/3: The Final Insult, and Madkane says No Quid? No Quo!.

Lisa Casey on the rush to genuflect before Rush.

A worthwhile John Updike tribute, via One Good Move.

Dan Kurtzman’s latest political satire links.

Juan Cole with the early word on the Provincial Elections in Iraq.

“I’LL JUST TELL THEM I DON’T REMEMBER GIVING ORDERS TO WATERBOARD ‘EM, STACK THEM NAKED LIKE LAWN CHAIRS, OR MAKE THEM WATCH MY CONGRESSSIONAL TESTIMONY.”

“IN ORDER TO FURTHER SPARE THE PRESIDENT’S HAND AND WRIST, WE’VE DECIDED TO JUST DISPOSE OF ALL THE BUSH EXECUTIVE ORDERS ON A GIANT BONFIRE OF THE INSANITIES.”

“WHAT SIGNAL DOES IT SEND TO THE REST OF THE WORLD WHEN A MAJOR CABLE NETWORK GIVES MORE TIME TO DANGEROUS CHARACTERS THAN TO CHRIS MATTHEWS — NOW WAIT A MINUTE, I’D BETTER KEEP MY OPTIONS OPEN ON THIS ONE.”

“STEVE, I’VE DECIDED THAT IN ORDER TO RECAPTURE AMERICA’S STATURE IN THE WORLD, WE’VE GOT TO CAPTURE GEORGE BUSH AND DICK CHENEY, SEND THEM TO GITMO, AND HOLD THEM INDEFINITELY. IN FACT, JOHN McCAIN HAS INDICATED TO ME THAT HE PERSONALLY WANTS TO TRY OUT SOME NEW WATERBOARDING TECHNIQUES.”