The Satirical Political Report » General

Cory Booker’s Ultimate Penance: Appears in Obama’s Bain Commercial

Don Davis — Wed, 23 May 2012 00:53:43 +0000

“AS A DIRECT RESULT OF BAIN� CAPITAL, I LOST ALMOST EVERYTHING: MY CREDIBILITY, MY DIGNITY, AND EVEN MY ABILITY TO PRODUCE STEEL BALLS.”

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More on the Bain controversy at All Hat No Cattle.

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin: Fed up With Advocates of Charter Schools and Vouchers.

Was Chris Matthews Right? Is Romney Really a Conehead?

Don Davis — Mon, 21 May 2012 03:25:02 +0000

“AS SOON AS I LAND AT THE WHITE HOUSE ON MY AIRCRAFT FROM FRANCE, I’M GOING TO PROPOSE CONSUMING MASS QUANTITIES OF TAX-CUTS, AND REPLACING OBAMACARE WITH GAMES OF RING TOSS.”

Story here.

Romney’s Latest Lie: ‘I Was In The Graduate’

Don Davis — Sun, 20 May 2012 01:51:48 +0000

“IN ONE SCENE I WAS TOLD: THERE’S A GREAT FUTURE FOR ME IN ACTING PLASTIC.”

Romney Vows To Put Out ‘Prairie Fire Debt’ With ‘Prairie Dogs’

Don Davis — Wed, 16 May 2012 02:20:34 +0000

“AFTER JUST A FEW MONTHS WITH ME AS PRESIDENT, YOU’LL FEEL LIKE YOU ALWAYS HAVE THE CRAP BEING BEATEN OUT OF YOU.”

Story here.

Mitt Romney Weighs In On Time Magazine’s Breast-Feeding Cover

Don Davis — Mon, 14 May 2012 00:36:16 +0000

“I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH SOMEONE, EVEN AT AN ADVANCED AGE, SUCKING UP IN ORDER TO ENSURE THEIR SURVIVAL … I JUST SUGGEST THAT THIS YOUNG MAN FOLLOW MY EXAMPLE AND SWITCH FROM THE LEFT TEAT TO THE RIGHT.”

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Did Dubya offfer Mitt a dry teat? — at All Hat No Cattle.

Joe Biden Does It Again! Puts Obama on the G-Spot

Don Davis — Sun, 13 May 2012 02:47:53 +0000

“Now, everybody knows I love Amtrak. But what they may not know, is like Fellini, my favorite part is when the train goes through the tunnel.”

Romney Softens ‘Gay Stance’: Endorses ‘Separate But Equal’ Marriage

Don Davis — Sat, 12 May 2012 02:11:55 +0000

“OK, OK, THEY CAN GET MARRIED, BUT AFTER THE CEREMONY, INSTEAD OF A LIMO, THEY HAVE TO RIDE IN THE BACK OF A BUS.”

Why High School Hair Harassment Incident Proves Romney Was ALWAYS Out of Touch

Don Davis — Fri, 11 May 2012 01:56:03 +0000

“WHILE MOST PEOPLE OF THAT ERA WERE INTO THE POPULAR SONG WOOLY BULLY, MITT ROMNEY APPARENTLY WAS TURNED ON TO BULLYING THE WOOLY.”

Story here.

Romney Claims He Saved Nathan Detroit

Don Davis — Thu, 10 May 2012 01:45:36 +0000

“MY PRIORITY WAS MAKING THIS COUNTRY SO INSECURE, THAT THE MIDDLE CLASS MIGHT EVEN LOSE THE ABILITY TO BUY BABY ‘NEW SHOES’.”

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The Austerity Theory is a Big Lie – Stephen Pizzo forBuzzFlash at Truthout.

Lisa Casey with the latest Tea Party insanity.

The Rumor That Might Just Kill Off Romney’s Right Wing Support

Don Davis — Tue, 08 May 2012 03:20:56 +0000

“IT MIGHT JUST BE OVER ONCE THE BASE FINDS OUT ROMNEY HAS ALL HIS MONEY STASHED … IN THE GAYMAN ISLANDS.”