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The Satirical Political Report

"The Best Political REAM
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May 22nd, 2012

Cory Booker’s Ultimate Penance: Appears in Obama’s Bain Commercial

AS A DIRECT RESULT OF BAIN  CAPITAL, I LOST ALMOST EVERYTHING: MY CREDIBILITY, MY DIGNITY, AND EVEN MY ABILITY TO PRODUCE STEEL BALLS.”

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More on the Bain controversy at All Hat No Cattle.

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin: Fed up With Advocates of Charter Schools and Vouchers.

Recommended Reads at BartCopE!

May 20th, 2012

Was Chris Matthews Right? Is Romney Really a Conehead?

“AS SOON AS I LAND AT THE WHITE HOUSE ON MY AIRCRAFT FROM FRANCE, I’M GOING TO PROPOSE CONSUMING MASS QUANTITIES OF TAX-CUTS, AND REPLACING OBAMACARE WITH GAMES OF RING TOSS.”

Story here.

May 19th, 2012

Romney’s Latest Lie: ‘I Was In The Graduate’

“IN ONE SCENE I WAS TOLD: THERE’S A GREAT FUTURE FOR ME IN ACTING PLASTIC.”

May 15th, 2012

Romney Vows To Put Out ‘Prairie Fire Debt’ With ‘Prairie Dogs’

“AFTER JUST A FEW MONTHS WITH ME AS PRESIDENT, YOU’LL FEEL LIKE YOU ALWAYS HAVE THE CRAP BEING BEATEN OUT OF YOU.”

Story here.

May 13th, 2012

Mitt Romney Weighs In On Time Magazine’s Breast-Feeding Cover

“I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH SOMEONE, EVEN AT AN ADVANCED AGE, SUCKING UP IN ORDER TO ENSURE THEIR SURVIVAL … I JUST SUGGEST THAT THIS YOUNG MAN FOLLOW MY EXAMPLE AND SWITCH FROM THE LEFT TEAT TO THE RIGHT.”

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Did Dubya offfer Mitt a dry teat? — at All Hat No Cattle.

May 12th, 2012

Joe Biden Does It Again! Puts Obama on the G-Spot

“Now, everybody knows I love Amtrak. But what they may not know, is like Fellini, my favorite part is when the train goes through the tunnel.”

May 11th, 2012

Romney Softens ‘Gay Stance’: Endorses ‘Separate But Equal’ Marriage

“OK, OK, THEY CAN GET MARRIED, BUT AFTER THE CEREMONY, INSTEAD OF A LIMO, THEY HAVE TO RIDE IN THE BACK OF A BUS.”


May 10th, 2012

Why High School Hair Harassment Incident Proves Romney Was ALWAYS Out of Touch

“WHILE MOST PEOPLE OF THAT ERA WERE INTO THE POPULAR SONG WOOLY BULLY, MITT ROMNEY APPARENTLY WAS TURNED ON TO BULLYING THE WOOLY.”

Story here.

May 9th, 2012

Romney Claims He Saved Nathan Detroit

“MY PRIORITY WAS MAKING THIS COUNTRY SO INSECURE, THAT THE MIDDLE CLASS MIGHT EVEN LOSE THE ABILITY TO BUY BABY ‘NEW SHOES’.”

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The Austerity Theory is a Big Lie – Stephen Pizzo forBuzzFlash at Truthout.

Lisa Casey with the latest Tea Party insanity.

Recommended Reads at BartCopE!

May 7th, 2012

The Rumor That Might Just Kill Off Romney’s Right Wing Support

“IT MIGHT JUST BE OVER ONCE THE BASE FINDS OUT ROMNEY HAS ALL HIS MONEY STASHED … IN THE GAYMAN ISLANDS.”

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