“WATERBOARDING IS ONE THING, BUT THIS REALLY VIOLATES MY RIGHTS UNDER THE GENEVA CONVENTION.”

“OBAMA GETS SMART AND TRIES TO CAPTURE THE SWING VOTE, BY TAKING A JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH.“

“MEANWHILE, McCAIN, AS OLD AS THE MUMMY AND BEHAVING LIKE THE JOKER IN THE DARK KNIGHT,  CONFIRMS THAT HE’S STEP BROTHERS WITH THE SPACE CHIMPS KNOWN AS THE BUSH ADMINISTRATION.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin on The Secret Diaries of Dick Cheney.

Lisa Casey compares the Obama and McCain Energy Plans.

The Daily Show’s The News Better Run, at One Good Move.

“I THOUGHT I WOULD LOOK BETTER STANDING NEXT TO SOMEONE WHO FLIP-FLOPPED MORE THAN I DID.”

“IT WON’T COMPLETELY DROWN OUT THE OBNOXIOUS NOISE FROM THE ‘GOP HATE MACHINE,’ BUT AT LEAST IT’S A START.”

“IT WAS ALL PART OF DICK CHENEY’S MASTER PLAN: CREATE SUCH AN OUTRAGEOUS TRANSPARENT LIE THAT PEOPLE WOULD BE DISTRACTED FROM THE BULLSHIT OVER IRAQ.”

BuzzFlash has the review of Suskind’s book: The Way of the World: A Story of Truth and Hope in an Age of Extremism.

The Race Genie is out of the bottle on The Daily Show, courtesy of One Good Move.

Lisa Casey reports on W’s vacation plans.

“IF JOHN McCAIN TIRES AND FALLS ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL OF STATE, IT’LL BE THE WHOLE COUNTRY THAT’LL END UP IN A DITCH.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Purple Heart Band-Aids and Tire Gauges, at Perrspectives.  And Crooks & Liars has more on the GOP “inflation” of the tire gauge issue.

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin: Corporate Media Ignores White House Planning of “False Flag” Operations to Trigger War with Iran.

VOICEOVER:

“BARACK OBAMA PLAYS THE ‘RACE CARD’ BY CLAIMING HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE THE PRESIDENTS ON OUR CURRENCY. BUT WHO SAYS BARACK OBAMA DOESN’T LOOK LIKE A JEFFERSON?

“WEEZY, WE’RE MOVIN ON UP, TO THE WHITE HOUSE, WE FINALLY GOT A PIECE OF THE PIE.”

Plagued by perceptions that he’s too elite and can’t relate to white working class voters crucial to his Presidential hopes, Barack Obama announced today his plan to immediately resume his pack-a-day cigarette habit.

Addressing reporters while puffing away in the doorway of the Chicago high-rise that houses his campaign headquarters, Obama unveiled his new slogan, “Smoke You Can Inhale In.” 

The presumptive Democratic nominee also revealed an advertising deal he struck with Marlboro, in which Obama will break the last remaining color barrier in America, by becoming the first black Marlboro Man. 

The McCain campaign wasted no time in mocking Obama’s “flip-flop” on his nicotine addiction, and immediately ran a series of ads claiming that Obama was really smoking French cigarettes.  A second McCain ad, contradicting the first, sought to subtly play the “race card” by asserting that Obama was actually sucking on Newport Menthols –  the brand most favored in the African American community — and depicted Obama as nothing more than a celebrity, like Smokey Robinson.

The McCain camp also put out a press release stating that Obama’s smoking was a bit “presumptuous” and “arrogant,” by seeking to associate himself with a former President who also hailed from a ”Hyde Parke.”

President Bush also jumped into the fray, stating that “John McCain is the only candidate capable of continuing our policies of ‘smoke and mirrors,’ and ensuring that the entire world goes up in smoke.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Speaking of the blue-collar vote, BuzzFlash reviews State of Confusion: Political Manipulation and the Assault on the American Mind.

Dan Kurtzman’s Political Cartoons of the Week.

Jack Tierney on McCain’s Desperate Filth.

VOICEOVER:

DO WE REALLY WANT SOMEONE WHO STUBBORNLY STICKS TO THE SAME POLICIES, EVEN WHEN THOSE POLICIES HAVE ALREADY VISITED NUMEROUS PLAGUES UPON THE COUNTRY?”

But Obama Really Needs to Learn a Good First Punch, according to BuzzFlash’s P.M. Carpenter.

Speaking of plagues, Lisa Casey has  Bush’s “Canned Legacy.”

“ACCORDING TO MY HIGH-LEVEL SOURCES IN THE PENTAGON, CHENEY ACTUALLY BELIEVED THE REAL BUSH WAS MORE OBEDIENT, BUT THAT THE SEAL WAS MORE COMPETENT TO CARRY OUT CHENEY’S PLAN OF GLOBAL DOMINATION.” 

[Think Progress with the real Cheney/Navy Seal Story.]

BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin: McCain the Maverick Guttersnipe Brings on the White Girls, the Black Guy and Race.

Jon Perr on “High Horse, Low Road”: Bush Was Right About McCain.

Juan Cole on Pakistani Intelligence Agency Linked to Indian Embassy Bombing.

And Congrats to Madkane! Bob Newhart Names “Mad” Kane Winner of 2008 Robert Benchley Society Award for Humor.