The Satirical Political Report » chris christie

Chris Christie Defends Absence From NJ: ‘I’m Battling Blizzard Beach’

Don Davis — Thu, 30 Dec 2010 02:03:42 +0000

“I CAN’T TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES I GOT STUCK IN THOSE NARROW SLIDES, AND HAD TO BE PLOWED OUT.”

Ray LaHood Makes Chris Christie ‘An Offer He Couldn’t Refuse’

Don Davis — Sat, 09 Oct 2010 02:36:34 +0000

“I TOLD THAT FAT FUCKER: ‘NEVER GO AGAINST THE� RIVER RAIL PROJECT, OR YOU’LL BE SLEEPING WITH THE FISHES UNDER THE HUDSON RIVER’.”

Chris Christie Appoints ‘Snooki’ as New Jersey Education Commissioner

Don Davis — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 02:28:48 +0000

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“NOT ONLY DOES SNOOKI REPRESENT NEW JERSEY’S IDEA OF A RACE TO THE TOP, BUT SHE’S GOOD WITH NUMBERS, SINCE SHE AT LEAST KNOWS WHAT EXIT SHE’S AT ON THE JERSEY SHORE.”

Story�here.

Monty Python Takes Revenge on Chris Christie for Copyright Violations

Don Davis — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 19:42:34 +0000

“AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT … THE MINISTRY OF FAT WALKS, A SPANISH INQUISITION TORTURE WITH A BIG MAC, AND AN OBESE LUMBERJACK WHO WEARS WOMEN’S CLOTHES AND HAS SEX WITH A DEAD PARROT.”

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Story and video at Huffington Post

Despite Negative Ads, Chris Christie Insists He’ll Still ‘Chew the Fat’ With Corzine

Don Davis — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 17:15:58 +0000

“EVEN THOUGH A LOSS TO JON CORZINE IN THE NEW JERSEY GUBERNATORIAL RACE MAY SIGNAL THE TWILIGHT OF MY CAREER, I’LL STILL BE PREPARED TO …�‘SERVE’ THIS MAN.”