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The Satirical Political Report

"The Best Political REAM
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November 28th, 2008

Bill O’Reilly: Detroit’s Problems Due to UAW’s Bathroom Breaks

“NOT ONLY ARE THESE FIVE MINUTE BREAKS, TWICE A DAY, CAUSING LOSS OF PRODUCTIVITY, BUT THE ‘EMISSIONS’ FROM THESE BREAKS ARE THE CHIEF CAUSE OF POLLUTING THE ENVIRONMENT.”

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Countdown on the Fuzzy $70 per Hour Math, courtesy of One Good Move.

September 9th, 2008

Emboldened by MSNBC Cave-in, Right-Wingers Demand CBS Remove Edward R. Murrow From Archives

“IF MURROW HADN’T MADE HIS SCURRILOUS ATTACK ON JOE McCARTHY IN THE ’50′s, TODAY CHINA WOULD BE A U.S. PUPPET, WE’D STILL HAVE STAY-AT-HOME MOMS, AND KIDS WOULD BE EXPERIMENTING WITH HULA HOOPS INSTEAD OF DRUGS.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Based on the latest polls, BuzzFlash’s P.M. Carpenter laments The American Electorate: From Dingbats to Dingoes.  

Palin and Religion; Need something, just pray — at One Good Move.  (God help us!)  

Madkane’s sneak peek at Sarah Palin’s Barracuda Blog.

December 23rd, 2006

BILL O’REILLY’S TWELVE DAYS OF THE WAR ON XMAS

On the first day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
A Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the second day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the third day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the fourth day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the fifth day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the sixth day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Six months of abortion
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the seventh day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Seven illegals swarmin‚
Six months of abortion
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the eighth day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Eight Hannukah candles
Seven illegals swarmin‚
Six months of abortion
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the ninth day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Nine gays a layin’
Eight Hannukah candles
Seven illegals swarmin‚
Six months of abortion
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the tenth day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Ten stem cell researchers
Nine gays a layin’
Eight Hannukah candles
Seven illegals swarmin‚
Six months of abortion
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the eleventh day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Eleven Darwin books from Amazon
Ten stem cell researchers
Nine gays a layin’
Eight Hannukah candles
Seven illegals swarmin‚
Six months of abortion
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran

On the twelfth day of the War on Christmas
My multi-cultural enemies gave to me . . .
Twelve Keith Olbermann commentaries
Eleven Darwin books from Amazon
Ten stem cell researchers
Nine gays a layin’
Eight Hannukah candles
Seven illegals swarmin‚
Six months of abortion
Five “HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Four Kwanzaa kinaras
Three French Kerrys
Two lesbian moms
And a Muslim Congressman swearing on the Koran!

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By the way, I’ll be appearing on Thom Hartmann‚Äôs radio program this coming Tuesday, December 26th, at 10:30 am EST/7:30 am PST.

BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash review of satiric book: Newt Gingrich’s Bedtime Story for Orphans.

Daily Show’s “the children are the future,” via One Good Move.

‘The Decider’ Fooling Himself Again, Fires Disagreeing Generals — at Progressive Daily Beacon.

Nicole Belle at Crooks & Liars: EPA Paves Way for Zero Emission Requirements.

Blue Texan at Unclaimed Territory: What Haditha says about the warbloggers.

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