“IF YOU THINK MY 1988 SPEECH WAS LONG,  I CAN FILIBUSTER THIS THING TO THE END OF 2008!

Bill’s dissatisfaction, at Huffington Post.

“IF BILL COULD’VE PLAYED THE ‘RACY’ CARD INSTEAD OF THE ‘RACE’ CARD, HILLARY WOULD’VE GOTTEN THE SYMPATHY VOTE AND STILL BE IN THE RACE.”

“IN ONE SENSE, YOU’RE NEVER REALLY PREPARED TO HANDLE EXTRA-MARITAL AFFAIRS. EVEN AFTER MY WHOLE FIRST TERM AS PRESIDENT, I STILL SCREWED IT UP.”

Just a small town girl, livin’ in Goldwater world
She took the midnight train .. to Wellesley
Just a country boy, fell in love with Hill at Yale
Took the Rhodes to Oxford, but never did in-hale

Bill’s two terms seemed to end too soon
Fighting off the impeachment doom
Now Hill’s rightful turn is filled with gloom
It goes on and on and on and on

Don’t stop believin’
Hold on to the feelin’ ….

A DAVID CHASE PRODUCTION

10. Even with your back to the TV, you cringe with recognition of Richard Perle’s voice on Hardball.

9. When your wife starts to play with your family jewels, you say “wait ’till after Bill Maher’s New Rules.”

8. You’ll root against a sports team just because they’re from a Red State.

7. When you ask someone their “sign,” you mean Jesus Fish or Darwin Fish.

6. You use “Picture-in-Picture” to watch Russert and Stephanopoulous.

5. You think the New York Times is really controlled by the Editorial Board of the Wall St. Journal.

4. Your idea of multitasking is reading Daily Kos while listening to NPR.

3. You’re all for “mixed marriages,” except for the one between Matalin and Carville.

2. You oppose capital punishment in all cases — with the possible exception of Chris Matthews.

1. Although you’re ACLU on personal privacy, you advocate warrantless strip searches of the Right-Wing Blondes — to check if their carpets really match their drapes.