The Satirical Political Report » ben nelson

To Get Ben Nelson’s Health Care Vote, Nebraska To Receive Kansas

Don Davis — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 19:16:31 +0000

“IT’S BEING CALLED THE ‘NEW KANSAS-NEBRASKA ACT.’ WE’LL ALL BE ENSLAVED TO THE INSURANCE COMPANIES, AND THERE’LL BE A HELLUVA’ LOTTA’ BLEEDING.”

Grand Compromise in Senate? Public Option to Be Limited to Guy Named ‘Fred’

Don Davis — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 01:33:41 +0000

“AND JUST TO TRY TO GET SENATORS LIEBERMAN, NELSON AND LINCOLN ON BOARD, WE CHERRY-PICKED THIS GUY ‘FRED’ PRECISELY BECAUSE HE NEVER EVEN GOES OUT IN PUBLIC.”

Ben ‘Half-Ass Nelson’ Gets Himself in a Half-Nelson

Don Davis — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 14:53:33 +0000

“I’M OUT TO STRANGLE THE TRUTH, THE ECONOMY, AND ULTIMATELY MYSELF.”

Video posted at Democratic Underground.

‘Centrist Senators’ Cut Out Heart Defibrillators as ‘Non-Stimulative’

Don Davis — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 14:13:49 +0000

�

“BY CLUTTERING�UP THIS BILL�WITH LIFE-SAVING DEVICES, WE’RE JUST WORKING AGAINST OUR GOAL OF REDUCING UNEMPLOYMENT.”

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�P.M. Carpenter at BuzzFlash on The Joy of Republican Hysteria, and Madkane says:�Hey Republicans, Go Filibuster Yourselves!

Centrist ‘Gang of 20′ Senators Took Instructions From Rumsfeld

Don Davis — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 20:45:25 +0000

“RUMMY ADVISED THAT�THE STIMULUS�PACKAGE HAVE�LESS�MONEY THAN WAS LOOTED IN OUR�FIRST�WEEK OCCUPYING BAGHDAD.”

“One of the ‘knowns’ we�know is that I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about.”