The Satirical Political Report

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February 12th, 2010

GOP Senator Puts a Hold On the Earth’s Rotation

“NOW, AHM NOT ADMITTIN’ THE JUNK SCIENCE THAT THE EARTH ACTUALLY ROTATES, BUT AH WILL KEEP THIS COUNTRY IN DARKNESS UNTIL MY HOME STATE COMPANY IS AWARDED THE FEDERAL LIGHT BULB CONTRACT .”

February 3rd, 2010

Forget Dems and Rethugs, Obama to Take Q&A From Jedi Council

“NOW, WE GOTTA’ ASK OURSELVES,  IF WE  CAN PUT A COUNCIL  ON SUCH PLANETS AS OSSUS, ALDERAAN AND CHANDRILA, WHY IS IT WE STILL CAN’T PASS TRULY UNIVERSAL HEALTH INSURANCE.”

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Staying with  “Star” themes, Norm Jenson on Obama as Star Trek’s Spock.

Last holy alliance between Rush and Sarah? — via Lisa Casey.

BuzzFlash’s Interview with Liberal Radio’s Bob Kincaid.

BartCopE! with the Sublime Prime Time Programming’ Edition.

January 30th, 2010

GOP Calls for Rematch, With Obama’s Cardboard Cutout

“WE’LL STILL GET OUR ASSES KICKED, BUT AT LEAST WE’LL GO HOME WITH A SOUVENIR WE CAN SELL ON EBAY.”

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Lisa Casey on another dividebetween U.S. and Chinese Executives.

January 29th, 2010

GOP Demands OBAMA Retreat at GOP Retreat

“NO, I DID NOT HONOR YOUR DEMAND THAT I BRING YOU POLAND SPRING WATER.”

January 26th, 2010

Massachusetts Lesson Learned: Obama to Give State of Union From Truck

“EVERYDAY, IT’S BECOMING CLEARER TO ME THAT THE ONLY WAY TO GET THE MESSAGE OUT … IS TO HIT THE PEOPLE WITH A 4X4.”

November 30th, 2009

Obama’s Radical Proposal to Solve ALL Issues

“THIS LEGISLATION REALLY HAS SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE. EVERY U.S. CITIZEN GETS DRAFTED INTO THE ARMED FORCES AND SENT TO AFGHANISTAN, THUS PROVIDING BOTH UNIVERSAL EMPLOYMENT AND UNIVERSAL SINGLE-PAYER HEALTH INSURANCE FOR ALL.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin on the NRA Enabling the Terrorism of Gun Deaths.

Madkane’s Testy Republicans.

Dan Kurtzman’s 30 Funniest Videos of the Decade.

November 16th, 2009

Obama Convinces Chinese Leaders They Have Nothing to Fear From ‘Twitter’

“BY THE TIME ANY ‘TRAITOROUS’ TWEETS IN 140 ‘CHINESE CHARACTERS’ ARE WRITTEN AND SENT, YOU’LL BE ABLE TO BUILD A NEW WALL, REPOSSESS AMERICA … AND STILL HAVE TIME TO CRUSH THE REVOLUTION.”

October 10th, 2009

Forget Nobel Peace Prize, Obama Wins ‘Dancing With the Stars’

http://lh4.ggpht.com/_ZP1S6Myct3U/Ski8hxIoqFI/AAAAAAAACPE/vmWigiMAqRE/dancing-with-stars-judge%5B2%5D.jpg

“WE’VE DECIDED TO GIVE THE TOP PRIZE TO BARACK OBAMA, JUST FOR NOT BEING TOM DeLAY, WHO THREATENED TO SET BACK THE ART OF DANCE TO BEFORE MAN COULD STAND ON TWO LEGS.”

October 8th, 2009

FOX News Starts Its Own Weather Channel

“TONIGHT’S FORECAST: DON’T BELIEVE THE MULTINATIONAL CORPORATIONS ARE PISSING ON YOUR LEG; IT’S REALLY THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION CREATING THE RAIN.”

Here’s the BuzzFlash Forecast: FOX News is a Turn Off. Return the Favor.

March 25th, 2009

Media Critics: Obama Needs to Attend ‘Anger NON-Management Class’

“OK, CLASS, THIS SOCIETY SIMPLY CAN’T TOLERATE A COOL, RATIONAL, THOUGHTFUL INDIVIDUAL. SO FOR LESSON NUMBER ONE, PLEASE LEAN YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR WINDOW AND SHOUT: I’M MAD AS HELL AND I’M GOING TO TWITTER ABOUT IT.”

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Letterman Takes on Obama’s Critics, via Dan Kurtzman.

Lisa Casey on the latest Jindal common-sense swindle.

Madkane on an Email Swiped From Dick Cheney’s In-Box.

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