“My fellow citizens. I assumed the office of the Presidency with the best of intentions — to try to change both the culture of Washington, and the way business is done here.
But after just two short weeks, I realized that I was HOPE-lessly naive. That trying to negotiate with the know-nothing Neanderthal, Limbaugh-ass-sucking, tax-cut-a-saurus, fickle-down Reagan-worshipping Rethuglicans, is about as pointless as trying to resuscitate our ailing economy by exporting tea to China.
So here’s the REAL CHANGE I’m now proposing:
Forget the bank bailouts, we’re gonna use the remaining TARP dollars to buy up the TOXIC GOP ASSES from Congress. For far less than the cost of any stimulus package to the Treasury, we’ll put these “bad asses” in a “bad holding tank,” where they can’t do any further damage to this great nation.
I know I promised to close Guantanamo, but it’s clear that the legal system is simply not equipped to deal with these nihilsts who are out to destroy our very way of life.
But let’s be clear — the WAR ON ERROR will not be won in a year, or even during this generation. We must remain ever-vigilant against these malefactors of great mischief.
And now that I finally did what I had to do to the Rethuglicans, it’s time for a smoke.
————————————————————————————————–
BLOGWORTHIES:
BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin strikes a similar note: Water Doesn’t Trickle Down the Middle of the Road, President Obama.
Dick Cheney’s New Wheelchair, at All Hat No Cattle.
The Daily Show’s Big ‘Bama’s House – at One Good Move.
Dan Kurtzman’s Political Cartoons of the Week, and Obama the Comedian.
 
