“YA, I TOLD PRESIDENT OBAMA HE CAN CHECK DA’ TERRORISTS INTO ZEE HOTEL CALEEFORNIA ANYTIME HE VANTS … BUT ZEY CAN NEVER LEAVE.”

“THESE PIES ARE BEING MADE FROM HIPPIE COMMUNISTIC ORGANIC APPLES, WHICH ARE PICKED BY ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS, AND WHICH THE ADMINISTRATION PLANS TO DISTRIBUTE AS PART OF THEIR SOCIALIZED MEDICAL PLAN TO KEEP THE DOCTOR AWAY.”

“SO MUCH FOR BI-PIE-TISANSHIP.”

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Bobby Jindal as the New ‘Hoover’, at All Hat No Cattle.

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin: Most Wealthy Liberals Won’t Back Progressive Media.

Dan Kurtzman’s The Week in Political Cartoons

“ZESE REPUBLICANS ARE LIKE CRAZY CYBORGS WITH NO FEELINGS, AND UNLESS VEE GO BACK IN TIME AND MAKE SURE THEY AREN’T BORN, THE WHOLE WORLD, AND NOT JUST CAL-EE-FORNIA, MIGHT COME TO AN END.”

“VEE NEED A REAL AMERICAN, LIKE JOHN McCAIN, WHO VILL KEEP US IN A STATE OF … BARBARITY.”

“IF THE FEDS DON’T LOAN ME 7 BILLION DOLLARS, I VON’T BE BACK!”

Story here.

“I CONGRATULATE GOVERNOR SCHWARZENEGGER IN LEADING HIS STATE TO BECOME THE FIRST TO BAN OVERWEIGHT WOMEN WITH PENISES.”

How we allocate funds

For Homeland Defense

Plainly defies

All common sense

Since backwater towns

That raise cattle and pork

Get more per capita

Than D.C. or New York

So city slickers shouldn’t cry in their milk

Protecting the food supply is no easy task

But do we really need

Hazmat suits for pigs

And each cow with their own gas mask?

[From One State Two State Red State Blue State]

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A “MODEST PROPOSAL” TO PREVENT TERRORISM:

Now, nobody asked my opinion, but what do Islamic terrorists fear more than anything else? What is their “Kryptonite”? You guessed it, Menstrual Blood:

What do we need to protect

Our large cities and towns

As well as our farms and our fields?:

A coast to coast carpet, consisting of

Soiled sanitary napkins and used panty shields

Now that’s what you call thinking “out of the box,” or is it “in the box?”

===================================

This just in from Bill O’Reilly: “U.S. attacked Japanese at Pearl Harbor.” Norm at One Good Move has the Olbermann video hanging Mr. No-Spin-Zone out to dry.