“NOTHING IS OVER TILL WE DECIDE IT IS! DID WE GIVE UP ON SOCIAL SECURITY WHEN THE GERMANS BOMBED PEARL HARBOR? DID WE GIVE UP ON HEALTH CARE WHEN THE REPUBLICANS BOMBED DECENCY AND COMMON SENSE? HELL NO!

10.  Conjugal visits by 72 virgins would severely strain resources of U.S. Marshall’s Service.

9. Federal Civil Rights laws bar anal plunging.

8. NY License Plates would suddenly read ‘JIHADMAN.’

7. Thufferin’ Thuccotash! Terrorists would have better speech therapy than Rudy.

6. 9/11 plotters would be less estranged from their families than Rudy.

5. Afraid they’ll get more media exposure than Rudy through MSNBC’s Al Qaeda Lockup.

4. Terrorists may let Bernard Kerik use their cells for secret prison trysts.

3.  Defendants could get representation by Rudy’s ‘Cousin Vinny’.”

2. Successful prosecutions would overshadow Rudy’s own 100% conviction rate against squeegee men.

1.  Since gas chamber has been abolished, Rudy would look silly witnessing executions wearing his gas mask.

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Norm Jenson with Jon Stewart’s rip of Rudy.

“I DON’T CARE IF THE OBAMA JUSTICE DEPARTMENT SEEKS THE DEATH PENALTY, THEY SIMPLY DON’T HAVE THE POWER TO PUT KSM ON DOUBLE SECRET PROBATION.”

“The issue here is not whether I broke a few rules, or took a few liberties with laws against bribery and corruption; I did. (winks) But you can’t hold a governor responsible for his own sick, perverted behavior. For if you do, then shouldn’t we blame the whole whole State of Illinois, including its favorite sons Abraham Lincoln and Barack Obama? And if the whole State of Illinois is guilty, then isn’t this an indictment of all of our states and institutions in general?  Isn’t this an indictment of our entire American society?  Well, you can do what you want to me, but I’m not going to sit here and listen to you bad-mouth the United States of America! Gentlemen!”

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Dan Kurtzman has the complete  Blago roundup.

And here’s a YouTube “mix” of Blago and Otter: