The Satirical Political Report » alaska

Ousted Honduran President Seeks Help From Woody Allen

Don Davis — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 01:06:54 +0000

“I SAID, ‘MR. EL PRESIDENTE,�MY SERVICES COULD�BE BETTER PUT TO USE RIGHT NOW OVERTHROWING THE BANANA REPUBLICS IN�ALASKA�AND SOUTH CAROLINA’.”

Why al-Zawahiri is Completely Out of Touch With His ‘House Negro’ Remark

Don Davis — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 02:05:18 +0000

The man is simply stuck in the past: AMERICA NO LONGER HAS ANY ‘NEGROES,’ AND�AMERICANS�NO LONGER LIVE IN�HOUSES.

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From Afghanistan to Baked Alaskan, via Lisa Casey.

Daschle on Healthcare, at One Good Move.

Good Stuff, as always, at BartCop Entertainment.

CBS’s New Hit Show: The Wasilla Hillbillies

Don Davis — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 00:06:02 +0000

Come and listen to a story about a woman named�Sarah
An�Alaskan pit bull, who�wore lipstick and�mascara,
Then one day she was field-dressin’�a moose,
And�along comes�McCain, holding�his own noose.

��

Seekin’ VP that is, Not�black or old, Sexist�plea.�

�

Well the first thing you know ol�Sarah’s a big riser,
Talkin’ trash, knockin’ community organ-izers
Said “Top of�the�ticket, is�the place I oughtta’ be”
So she�looted�Neiman�Marcus, for the whole familee.�

�

Designer clothes, that is. Valentino, Not Donna�Koran. �

Now its time to say goodbye, to�Sarah and�her kin.
She plans to do�some studyin’,�to�find those�Africans.
You’re all invited back, to�see�what she can do that’s dumber�
While she plots to run in�two-oh-�twelve with Mr. Joe the Plumber

For President,�that is.�Can’t spell, Takes her shoes off to count.

She’ll be back in four,�y’hear?.

“JED CLAMPETT, WELCOME SIR. IS IT TRUE THAT JETHRO’S FIXIN’ TO VOTE FOR THAT PALIN WOMAN IN 2012.”

“MR. MATTHEWS,�I GOTTA HAVE A LONG TALK WITH THAT BOY.”

�

Ted Stevens Convicted by Jury on the ‘Palin Theory’

Don Davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 00:57:49 +0000

“WE HEREBY FIND THAT THE DEFENDANT’S CONTRACTORS ‘SAWED’ ON HIS HOUSE, ‘ON THE HOUSE’.”

1960′s Radical William Ayers Gets the Last Laugh!

Don Davis — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 22:08:52 +0000

“TODAY, THE MARKETS SOARED AS THE U.S. GOVERNMENT ANNOUNCED IT’S PARTIAL TAKEOVER OF THE BANKING SYSTEM,�WITH A LARGE INFUSION OF …�DAS KAPITAL.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Staying on topic, Greenspan’s Folly, All Hat No Cattle.

BuzzFlash�s Mark Karlin asks: What�s the Difference Between the McCain Campaign and George Wallace?

Change Depends, at One Good Move.

Sarah In Wonderland, by Madkane.

Troopergate’s True Meaning: Palin Breaks a New Glass Ceiling

Don Davis — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 18:16:48 +0000

�

THE FIRST FEMALE POLITICIAN TO HARRASS A SUBORDINATE FOR HIS … �EX!

What Troopergate Tells Us About a (God Forbid) Palin Vice Presidency

Don Davis — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 14:08:08 +0000

“YES, IS THIS THE U.S. MARSHAL’S SERVICE? … VICE PRESIDENT PALIN HERE.� DID YOU KNOW THAT PRESIDENT McCAIN WAS ABUSIVE TOWARD HIS FIRST WIFE AFTER HE RETURNED FROM VIETNAM?

Troopergate Report: Palin Acted Like Russia’s Putin, From Her House!

Don Davis — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 00:40:55 +0000

“I GUESS I LOOKED INTO HER SOUL, AND LOST MY SOUL.”

GOP House Members Seek New Provision: A Bailout ON John McCain

Don Davis — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 15:05:37 +0000

“WHEN YOU HAVE A SUB-PRIME CANDIDATE, WHO FURTHER MORTGAGED HIS FUTURE WITH�OVER-VALUED ALASKAN PROPERTY, WE NEED A NEW PLAN INVOLVING A NOMINEE SWAP, BEFORE THERE’S A COMPLETE�RUN ON THE GOP.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

P.M. Carpenter at BuzzFlash: The Bailout Could Be McCain�s Best Hope.

Norm Jenson with The Sunday Funnies, and Dan Kurtzman with Political Cartoons of the Week.

Release Princess Sarah From the Dark Tower! ��at Zencomix.

Putin to Seek Governorship of Alaska

Don Davis — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 15:15:23 +0000

“NOT ONLY CAN I SEE ALASKA FROM MY DACHA, BUT WHEN THE�PRESENT GOVERNOR REARS HER AIRHEAD, IT’S MORE OF A DANGER TO RUSSIAN AIRSPACE THAN CHERNOBYL.”