The Satirical Political Report

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February 28th, 2013

GOP Blows It Again, on Rosa Parks Statue

“IT’S VERY NICE, MR. PRESIDENT, BUT DON’T YOU THINK THIS PARTICULAR STATUE SHOULD BE IN THE BACK OF STATUARY HALL.”

February 27th, 2013

John Boehner’s Latest Sequester Proposal: The Chat & Cut

“WE’LL BE  PREPARED TO CHAT ALL DAY WITH THE PRESIDENT ABOUT ELIMINATING TAX BREAKS FOR CORPORATIONS AND THE WEALTHY, AS LONG AS WE CAN CUT  THE VITAL LIFE-LINES FOR WORKING PEOPLE AND THE POOR.”

February 26th, 2013

How to Turn The Sequester Lemon Into ‘Lemonade’

“BY  CUTTING  OUT JUST A SMALL PERCENTAGE OF HOUSE REPUBLICANS, WE CAN SUBSTANTIALLY ELIMINATE THE DEFICIT OF COMMON SENSE AND FAIRNESS, AND FINALLY START TO  REGROW THIS COUNTRY.”

February 25th, 2013

What Michelle Obama at The Oscars REALLY Meant to Say

“NEVER MIND BEST PICTURE, THIS MESSAGE IS FOR THE WORST REPUBLICAN PARTY: ARGO FUCK YOURSELF.”

February 21st, 2013

Obama’s Plan To Win Over Even Political Illiterates on the Budget Fight

“NOW, MANY OF YOU ARE UNDERSTANDABLY CONCERNED ABOUT THE EFFECT ON FIRST RESPONDERS, BUT DID YOU ALSO KNOW THAT AS A RESULT OF SEVERE SEACRESTATION, YOU MIGHT ALSO JUST LOSE YOUR FAVORITE AMERICAN IDOL.”

February 17th, 2013

GOP Put to Ultimate Shame by the ‘Papal Primaries’

“HOLY COW, IN CONTRAST TO THE GOP PRIMARIES BACK IN ’08, WHEN THE CANDIDATES TO SUCCEED POPE BENEDICT WERE ASKED TODAY IF ANY OF THEM DIDN’T BELIEVE IN EVOLUTION, NOT A SINGLE HAND SHOT UP TOWARD THE HEAVENS.”

February 13th, 2013

TIME Pulls Marco Rubio Cover After SOTU Response

“WHO WOULD’VE THOUGHT THAT IN JUST ONE SHORT WEEK, MARCO RUBIO WENT FROM WALKING ON WATER, TO NOT BEING ABLE TO TALK WITHOUT WATER!”

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Mark Karlin of BuzzFlash at Truthout on Stuff It Dick (Cheney)!

February 10th, 2013

How to Finally Expose the NRA, as a Mere Shill for Gun Manufacturers

“WHEN WAYNE LaPIERRE WAS ASKED IF HE WOULD SUPPORT, AS A BASIC CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT, PROVIDING EVERY CITIZEN WITH A FREE GUN, THE HEAD OF THE NRA SUDDENLY KEELED OVER  … AS IF HE HAD BEEN SHOT WITH A BUSHMASTER AR-15.”

February 4th, 2013

Donald Trump Demands Obama Produce His Skeet-Shooting Certificate

“NOW WE KNOW THE PRESIDENT IS GONNA’ REFUSE, BY GIVING US THE B.S. STORY THAT YOU DON’T ACTUALLY NEED TO BE CERTIFIED TO SHOOT A RIFLE IN THIS COUNTRY.”

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Mental Health Evaluation For Gun Purchases, at All Hat No Cattle.

Mark Karlin on the lessons of Chris Kyle, a Navy SEAL gunned  down at shooting range.

Recommended Reads at BartCopE!

February 2nd, 2013

Obama’s Bold Demand, in Exchange for Release of Skeet-Shooting Photo

“OK, NOW LET’S SEE A PHOTO OF A TEA-PARTY REPUBLICAN … ACTUALLY READING A BOOK.”

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