“AS I UNDERSTAND IT, THE ‘THREE WISE MEN’ WEREN’T REALLY THAT WISE, THEY JUST ‘BOUGHT’ THAT REPUTATION BY BRIBING THE BABY JESUS WITH GIFTS. AND NEEDLESS TO SAY, THE GUY WHO BROUGHT THE GOLD, INSTEAD OF THE FRANKINCENSE OR MYRRH, WAS THE ONE WHO EVENTUALLY GOT ELECTED KING.”