“WITH HER WEST AFRICAN ACCENT, I MISTOOK HER QUESTION OF ‘TUCK, NO TUCK’ FOR ‘FUCK, NO FUCK.”

“ZATS HOW I FIRST GOT ZIS IDEA FOR GRAY DAVIS, EXCEPT WIT GRAY IT WAS EASIER TO GET HIM OUT OF OFFICE  … RATHER THAN GETTING THE HOUSEKEEPER’S KID BACK INTO ZEE WOMB.”

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Lisa Casey on the transformation of the Governator.

BartCopE! with your Recommended Reads.

“THE MAIN COMPONENT OF THIS PROGRAM IS CALLED ‘TAKING BACK MY OWN WORDS’ …  OR ELSE RISK BECOMING THE FIRST CASUALTY OF THE PAUL RYAN DEATH PANEL.”

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More on Newt from Madkane, and from Lisa Casey.

Law Professor Jonathan Turley

“LAWRENCE, APPARENTLY THE SUPREME COURT HAS NEVER RULED ON WHAT YOU TIP A CHAMBERMAID … WHO’S BEEN SEXUALLY ASSAULTED BY THE HEAD OF THE IMF.”

“WHADDYA’ TALKIN ABOUT. YA’ GOTTA’ GIVE HER AT LEAST FIVE MILLION FUCKIN’ EUROS.”

“ALTHOUGH MY EXPIRATION DATE PASSED LONG AGO, I’M STILL OUT THERE TRYING TO SELL WHAT CLEARLY SMELLS LIKE ROTTEN EGGS.”

Story here.

“IT’S KIND OF LIKE A PERPETUAL RUN IN THE REPUBLICAN PRIMARIES — YOU CAN STICK WITH UTTERING RIGHT-WING NONSENSE … WITHOUT EVER BEING CHALLENGED BY FOLKS WHO ARE ACTUALLY SANE.”

“YES, SENATOR, I ADMIT I CHANGED MY NAME TO RHYME WITH A PART OF THE FEMALE ANATOMY, TO REMIND MYSELF HOW MUCH I LOVE TO SCREW THE AMERICAN PEOPLE.”

Dark and lonely on the summer night.
Kill my landlord, kill my landlord.
Watchdog barking – Do he bite?
Kill my landlord, kill my landlord.
Slip in his window,
Break his neck!
Then his house
I start to wreck!
Got no reason –
What the heck!
Kill my landlord, kill my landlord.
C-I-L-L …
My land – lord …

“THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING — THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH.”

“FROM NOW ON, WE’RE DITCHING OUR OWN COURIERS … FOR UPS.”

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Lisa Casey back in the saddle at All Hat No Cattle with ‘The Dick.’

BuzzFlash’s Mark Karlin on Bill Maher’s Devastating Monologue on the GOP.

Recommended Readings at BartCopE!

“WE’VE BEEN RAISED NOT TO LOOK AT, OVER OR AROUND A WALL, AS LONG AS THERE MAY BE A TERRORIST HIDING BEHIND IT.”