“WE’RE GONNA’ PROVIDE PLANNED PARENTHOOD WITH EXTRA FUNDS TO DEVELOP A GIANT CONDOM TO PLACE OVER THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES … AND IF THAT DOESN’T WORK, THE EPA WILL HAVE THE POWER TO REGULATE RED-HOUSE GASES.”

“IN A BITTERLY DIVIDED 5-4 DECISION, THE MAJORITY OPINION BY JUSTICE SCALIA STATED THAT CHEESEHEAD-WEARING DEMOCRATS IN DANE COUNTY RESEMBLED THOSE DIMPLED CHADS IN FLORIDA, AND THEREFORE THEIR VOTES HAD TO BE THROWN OUT.”

Story here.

“UNDER OUR PLAN, WE PROVIDE FOLKS WITH A PARTIAL SUBSIDY FOR A CABLE BOX AND REMOTE,  AND THEY CAN GET AN INSTANT DIAGNOSIS WITHOUT ANY CO-PAYS OR DEDUCTIBLES.”

“I NOT ONLY HAVE THE PERFECT NAME BRAND RECOGNITION, BUT HAD TO DEAL WITH THE ULTIMATE IN HAIR-RAISING SITUATIONS FOR OVER THIRTY YEARS.”

“WE’VE GOTTEN SO WASTED, THAT WE CAN’T EVEN TELL THAT OUR POLITICS SMELL LIKE OUR OWN PUKE.”

“UNDER MODERN TEA PARTY REPUBLICAN PRINCIPLES , WE BELIEVE IN THROWING THE UNITED STATES CONSTITUTION INTO THE HARBOR.”

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Mark Karlin of BuzzFlash at Truthout on General Electric’s Legalized Theft of Tax Payer Dollars.