“WHAT BETTER WAY TO SEND A MESSAGE OF RUGGED INDIVIDUALISM, AND SET THE TABLE FOR REPEAL OF HEALTH CARE, BY CUTTING OFF GOVERNMENT ASSISTANCE AS SOON AS THEY CUT THE UMBILICAL CORD.”

“WE’RE TAKING THE POSITION THAT IT TAKES AT LEAST 60 VOTES FOR THE EARTH TO FINISH ITS REVOLUTION AROUND THE SUN, AND TO PLACATE OUR TEA PARTY REVOLUTIONISTS, WE’LL BE PROPOSING A CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT TO ADOPT THE MEDIEVAL POSITION THAT THE SUN CIRCLES THE EARTH.”

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BuzzFlash with The Perfect Storm of Plutocracy May Drown the Working Class, and Tea Party GOP Gets Ready to Talibanize the US Constitution.

Why Call Him God? — at One Good Move.

“I CAN’T TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES I GOT STUCK IN THOSE NARROW SLIDES, AND HAD TO BE PLOWED OUT.”

“ALWAYS KNEW THAT REVEREND WAS ONE CRAZY-ASS WHITE BOY, BUT NEVER REALIZED THE ’700 CLUB’ STOOD FOR  JUST HOW HIGH OFF THE GROUND HE WAS FLYING.”

Story on the pot-revering Reverend.

Coming off perhaps their biggest victory yet with the repeal of the military’s “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” policy, the leading gay and lesbian civil rights organizations are now planning to take on the last U.S. institution to follow this outdated policy: The Republican Party itself.

David Brock of  Media Matters, who served as a key leader of the campaign to repeal DADT in the armed forces, admitted that “this may well the most daunting task faced by the LGBT community, since the uber-macho culture of the GOP makes the United States Marine Corps look like a Sunday afternoon tea party.”

Brock, the ex-conservative who now exposes his former right-wing colleagues, added that “if a Ken Mehlman can be openly wedded to the Republican Party, then same-sex marriage should be a walk in the park.”

Not surprisingly,  John McCain immediately registered his objections, stating on the Senate floor that the GOP “simply cannot  afford such a radical change, particularly in the middle of the War Against Obama.” McCain later told Bill O’Reilly: “Just imagine how it would feel to suddenly wake up one morning and discover that the Chamber of Commerce lobbyist you’re in bed with … is actually gay!”

Senator Lindsey Graham also expressed grave concerns about reversing GOP policy, stating “once we, I mean ‘they,’ come out of the Log Cabin, the Republicans may have to actually start acting like the party of Lincoln.”  Graham also questioned “how we’re supposed to concentrate on showering the wealthy with tax breaks, if we’re worried about showering next to homosexuals in the Senate steam room.”

On the House side, Speaker-in-waiting John Boehner similarly rejected the notion of gays serving openly in the GOP, telling FOX News that “the last thing we need is a party populated by overly sensitive types who are prone to fits of crying.”

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When is US Government Secrecy and Censorship Like the Old Soviet Union?– at BuzzFlash.

Madkane’s Tragic Limerick Ode To John McCain.

Crooks And Liars on Who Were The Big Crooks And Liars Of 2010?

“EVERYONE KNOWS THE CITIZENS’ COUNCILS MERELY SPONSORED BAKE SALES FOR THE PTA, AND THAT’S WHERE I LEARNED THE VALUES OF ‘SEPARATE BUT EQUAL‘.”

“ACCORDING TO THE TEAM ORTHOPEDIST, I EXPECT MICHELE TO MISS THE NEXT FEW WEEKS OF ‘FOOT FETISH VIDEOS,’ SINCE THE CAR SHE WAS DRIVING, WITH HER FEET OUT THE WINDOW, ACTUALLY TURNED OVER AND ROLLED ONTO SOME ARTIFICIAL TURF.”

“WHO’S BETTER QUALIFIED THAN MY WIFE TO STICK OUT THEIR FEET ON THE SIDELINE AND TRIP OPPOSING PLAYERS.”

“UNDER MY BILL, PEOPLE LIKE MYSELF WILL BE CONTACTED BY A COUNSELOR EVERY 90 SECONDS, BEFORE I DO THE ULTIMATE HARM TO MYSELF, WHAT LITTLE IS LEFT OF MY REPUTATION, AND THE ENTIRE COUNTRY.”

Story here.

“AFTER LISTENING TO JON KYL AND LINDSEY GRAHAM, IT OCCURRED TO ME THAT NOT ONLY SHOULD I GET THE HOLIDAY OFF, BUT GIVING OUT ALL THESE PRESENTS IS REALLY PURE SOCIALISM.”