“IT’S A SLAM DUNK THAT PANETTA WON’T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THE WATERBOARDING, BUT IT’S HARD FOR A 70-YEAR OLD GUY TO STAND ON HIS FEET FOR 24 STRAIGHT HOURS.”

“JESUS H. CHRIST, MADOFF WAS ABOUT TO BRING DOWN THE VERY LAST INSTITUTION THAT THIS COUNTRY HAD ANY FAITH IN.”

“FORGET ABOUT SEATING ME, BY THE TIME I’M FINISHED INVESTIGATING, THIS PLACE WILL HAVE MORE EMPTY SEATS THAN A DETROIT LIONS HOME GAME IN THE FOURTH QUARTER.”

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Meg White at BuzzFlash asks: Did the Reagan Revolution actually win?

Lisa Casey’s Gaza Strip Fashion Statement.

Lewis Black on The End of the Universe, at One Good Move.

“MY PERSONAL SECRETARY IS THE DAUGHTER OF ROSEMARY WOODS, OTHERWISE KNOWN AS … ROSEMARY’S BABY.”

Story/Editorial at NY Times.

And BuzzFlash’s P.M. Carpenter notes that Right-wing propaganda is always good for a laugh.

“ANDERSON, MADOFF SOMEHOW CONNED ALL THE OLD FARTS INTO BELIEVING THAT THEY’D BECOME COOL, JUST BY BUYING A MOTORCYLE AND LEATHER JACKET FROM HIM.”

Dick, the magic Vigo, lived underground
And plotted to, control the world, so he could wear the crown
Coming back, from cardiac, beat all ghostbuster tricks,
Possessed man-child Bush, and stole his soul, so he could get his kicks

Dick, the magic Vigo, waterboarding undersea
Shredding the Constitution, citing Executive Uni-tary
Taking to evil to new heights, acting oh-so ’Darth Vader-ian’
We’d rather take our chances, with a 16th Century Carpathian

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BLOGWORTHIES:

Best SNL Moments, at One Good Move. 

Hand-off in the Green Zone, at All Hat No Cattle.

“WE FEEL THAT BEN CAN REVERSE OUR LONG LOSING TRADITION, BY REVERSING OUR USUAL LATE-SEASON COLLAPSES. THIS WAY, WE’LL START THE SCHEDULE BY LOSING, BUT THEN FINISH WITH A WINNING STREAK, AS OUR LEGS GET YOUNGER AT THE END OF THE SEASON.”

“WELL, YA’ KNOW, I KNEW ENOUGH, TO, YA’ KNOW, KNOW THAT YA’ DON’T HAVE TO KNOW ROCKET SCIENCE TO OPPOSE THE IRAQ WAR, SUPPORT BARACK OBAMA FOR PRESIDENT AND, YA’ KNOW,  KNOW THAT EVERY OTHER PERSON MIXED UP IN THIS PROCESS GOT THERE NOT BY WHAT THEY KNOW, BUT BY KNOWING THEIR FATHER OR HUSBAND.”

Politico.com on the, ya’ know, story.

“FOR THOSE WHO CAN’T DEAL WITH THE UNCONVENTIONAL TRAJECTORY OF BENJAMIN BUTTON’S LIFE, THIS BOOTLEG VERSION IS ACTUALLY SHOT IN REVERSE.  BUT LET ME SAY NO MORE, FOR FEAR THAT I’LL RUIN THE BEGINNING.”

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Our prayers and best wishes to Madkane and her family, who lost their mother.

“HERE’S A SONG I THINK YOU KIDS WILL REALLY ENJOY — AND YOUR MOM AND I AGREE IT’S EDUCATIONAL TOO”:

Bush, the magic drag-on, the lame GOP
Bollixed his whole Presidency, in a land called Iraqi
Little Dickie Cheney, loved to play real rough
Pulled Dubya’s strings and sealed his fate with a lotta’ made-up stuff

Bush, the magic drag-on, a sound economy
Let Wall Street crooks have their way, with complete autonomy
Little Hankie Paulson, lookin’ not so sharp
Can’t find the funds that he doled out, hidden by a TARP

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Given Chip Saltsman’s “musical taste,” he wins BuzzFlash’s GOP Hypocrite of the Week.

All Hat No Cattle’s Phototoon Year in Review.

And Puff The Real Magic Dragon Ain’t Too Happy.