In perhaps the final death knell for his¬†GOP Presidential aspirations,¬†Mitt Romney admitted today that he had exaggerated his credentials as a lifelong “gay-hunter.”

Addressing the South Carolina chapter of the NRA — the National Reactionary Association — Romney acknowledged that he had hunted gays only twice, and never actually had a gay-hunting license, which virtually all Southern males are issued by the age of 12.

Romney, already¬†battling the Christian Right’s antagonism to his Mormon upbringing,¬†also admitted¬†that one of his¬†hunts was¬†in a Georgia “gay preserve” stocked with homosexuals, as opposed to the more natural and challenging¬†environs of New York City’s Greenwich Village.

Romney also conceded that he had “hunted only small gays, varmints such as Richard Simmons, but nothing so large as Rosie O’Donnell.”

The former Governor of Massachussetts, who¬†has also been assailed by the GOP base for his previous support of gay marriage, informed the NRA that he only took that position in order to make it easier to “kill two birds with one stone.”

While previous candidates, such as John Kerry, were ridiculed for donning¬†hunter’s camouflage to prove their machismo to rural voters, Romney asserted that he would be leaving immediately on a gay-hunting trip, disguised as Liza Minelli to attract his prey.

 

 

 

 

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash: Will We See the Curtain Fall on Bushevism?

Salt Lake Mayor Rocky Anderson, on¬†his call for Bush’s impeachment, via Norm Jenson.¬†

Bush and Cheney Harboring Terrorists in Iraq, at PDB.

Imus Under Fire, at Crooks & Liars.