Displaying the swagger that had long been absent, President 
Bush triumphantly announced today that U.S. Special Forces had conducted a successful raid on the very heart of Al Qaeda’s training network: the terrorists’ notorious jungle gym.
Standing on the deck of an aircraft carrier, and surrounded by the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Bush asserted that “major strength and conditioning operations of Al Qaeda are over.”
The President further explained that satellite photos had revealed that every single al-Qaeda recruit had undergone basic training on this set of monkey bars, including the infamous female terrorist, Private al-Benjamini.
However, Seymour Hersh of The New Yorker has reported that the jungle gym wasn’t actually destroyed, since not enough troops were sent on the mission. Instead, U.S. commandos merely removed the thick layer of wood chips beneath the bars that are designed to cushion a fall. As Dick Cheney told FOX’s Sean Hannity, “now you’re gonna’ see a lot of terrorists with scraped elbows and knees.”
In order to prevent young children from being indoctrinated into radical Islamic groups, the Administration also outlined a plan to launch attacks on Middle Eastern playgrounds and Gymborees.
Bush further insisted that he was still committed to hunting down and capturing Osama bin Laden: “We’ll be lookin’ out for a six-foot five A-rab, hooked up to a dialysis machine, and doin’ pullups.”
Back in Iraq, however, the news concerning the training of government troops paints a dismal 
picture. A YouTube video of Iraqi recruits shows them to be disheveled and out-of-shape, hopelessly fumbling with their weapons, and chanting: BOOM IRAQA-LAKKA-LAKKA! BOOM IRAQA-LAKKA-LAKKA! … WHAT’S AN ATTACK, JACK?
————————————————————-BLOGWORTHIES:¬†
Paul Bremer: BuzzFlash GOP Hypocrite of the Week.
Colbert with Chris Hedges, author of American Fascists: The Christian Right and the War On America 
Bush speaks to Iran, at All Hat No Cattle.
Bush and GOP Endangering Troops for Political Gain, at PDB.
Glenn Greenwald on the significance of the Edwards blogger story.
