While all of the media attention has been sucked up by The Iraq Study Group, flying under the radar is a parallel report on the United States,prepared by a bipartisan group of Iraqi clerics.

“The¬†U.S. Study Group Report,” also known as the¬†al-Sadr Report,¬†after the radical Shiite cleric, concludes that the condition of the United States is “grave and deteriorating.”

The Report points to a dysfunctional electoral system, an inability to devise¬†coherent immigration or health care programs, and America’s¬†disturbing obsession¬†with crass game shows that¬†feature scantily-clad women holding up dollar signs.¬†

“Worst of all,” the Report continues, “the Americans can’t even coordinate the decibel levels of their TV¬†shows and the commercials.”

The key recommendation of the al-Sadr Commission is the immediate withdrawal of Bush and Cheney from the White House, or at the very least, a timetable of 24 hours.

The al-Sadr Report also urges that oil revenues be distributed evenly between Dick Cheney and …¬†everyone else; the dismantling of the Minutemen Militias and the L.A. Police Department; and¬†to minimize intra-party sectarian violence, the permanent separation of Howard Dean and James Carville.

Although deeply religious, both Sunnis and Shia on the Commission unanimously supported a proposal that the Republican Party be embedded with people who actually believe in evolution.

The al-Sadr Commission¬†urged the wholesale adoption of¬†its Report, but also emphasized that in order to save the United States, one recommendation should take priority over all others: the removal of Bill O’Reilly and his No-Spin Zone to Baghdad, beyond the protective cocoon of¬†the Green Zone.

==========================================================

BLOGWORTHIES:

Norman Solomon at BuzzFlash: Media Sham for Iraq War — It’s Happening Again.

Madkane’s¬†Ode To Diminished Expectations –¬†a Gates Limerick.

Lisa Casey’s Tears of a Clown’s … Father.

Norm Jenson with Lewis Black,¬†on children’s entertainment.

Glenn Greenwald on James¬†Baker’s hypocrisy.