Proving that there were¬†some “unknowns” that we didn’t know about a “know-it-all” SECDEF, a departing memo from Donald Rumsfeld concedes that his own¬†strategy in Iraq was not working and called for a major course correction.

Rumsfeld notes how the war has evolved from ‚Äúmajor combat operations to counterterrorism, to counterinsurgency, to dealing with death squads and sectarian violence — to Iraqis disguising themselves as Hasidic Jews in a desperate attempt to survive.”¬†

Most significantly, Rummy urged a change from “Stay the Course” to an admonition to the Iraqis to “Drop your Cocks and Grab your Socks” — which itself is unlikely to work, given the fact that the sock factory in Baghdad has no electricity.

Rumsfeld also suggested that the Administration consider a campaign to lower public expectations. “After all,” the departing Defense Secretary pointed out, “if we can just get the Iraqis to refrain from eating their young as an act of mercy, we should just declare victory and get the heck outta’ there.”

The Rumsfeld Memo was notable for its division into “above the line”¬†¬†and “below the line” suggestions.¬† Included within¬†the “above the line”¬†portion was the observation that Bush “was in over his head.”

Rumsfeld also saw some merit in paying off Iraqi leaders, suggesting that this wouldn’t strain the U.S. Treasury: “all we need to do is convince Halliburton to make restitution for all their rip-offs.”

In another case of “better-late-than-never,” Rumsfeld also asserted in the memo that “Vietnamization was simply not working, and that it was time that the U.S. consider a phased withdrawal of troops from Southeast Asia.”

In related news, Rumsfeld made one of his last official appearances yesterday at the annual Army-Navy football game, not only performing the coin-toss, but actually coaching the Army defense.  Unfortunately for Army, however, Navy scored the winning touchdown when Army had too few defenders on the field.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash Editorial:Bush’s Manifest Destiny: A White Man’s Burden.

Russert grills Hadley on Administration’s mistakes, via Crooks & Liars.

Progressive Daily Beacon on RFK.

Norm Jenson with Lewis Black’s reflections on Evangelical Christians.

Glenn Greenwald on the¬†Government’s domestic intelligence-gathering on U.S. citizens.¬†¬†¬†