12. Voting for a Democrat results in following message from electronic voting machine: “Your vote did not reach the intended candidate.”
11. Alternative message from electronic voting machine: “Due to changes to our Constitution, the vote you requested no longer exists.”
10. Alternative alternative message from electronic voting machine: “The page you requested is caucusing with the GOP House Leadership.”
¬†9. Mark Foley wins re-election — in Boystown, USA.
¬†8. Polling places broadcast continuous loop of the “Kerry botched joke.”
¬†7. Next to¬†names of Democratic candidates, ballots state: “The terrorists win.”
¬†6. Huge banner in front of polls say “Welcome to DIE BOLD.”
¬†5. Tennessee ballot reads: “To Vote For Harold Ford, Please Proceed to The Playboy Mansion.”¬†
¬†4. Virginia Ballot reads: “Vote for Senator Macaca, Not The Pervert Who Writes About Vietnamese Cocka.”
¬†3. Missouri Ballot reads: “A vote for McCaskill is a vote for cloning Michael Moore and Rosie O’Donnell.”¬†
¬†2. On election night, FOX News analysts explain that 62% across-the-board lead for Democrats in exit polls did not take account of individual races.
¬†1. On election eve,¬†Dennis¬†Hastert picks out new drapes for Speaker’s office, with the cast of Queer Eye.
Brent Budowsky at BuzzFlash: Time For Change: George Bush Attitudes Of Ridicule, Intolerance and Contempt Have Killed American Troops.
Lisa Casey’s Balance of Power Phototoon puts it all in perspective.
Madkane with an early Holiday gift: Walking in the Bushie Blunderland.
Glenn Greenwald on the expected election-eve Saddam¬†verdict:¬†The “Unsurprising Surprise.”
Crooks & Liars on Lieberman’s non-surprise.¬†Say it ain’t so, Joe.¬†¬†