HOLY FOLEY, BATMAN! In the most stunning development yet in the Congressional page scandal, a 16-year-old page from Texas has revealed a series of salacious emails and instant messages from none other than President George W. Bush himself. 

Following are some of the more nasty messages which the President, given his homo-erotic desires, sent under the name Un-Bush43:  

See, they call me the “Emperor,” cause I got no clothes.

You’re either within me, or against me.

Waterboarding really makes me hot.

First I’m gonna tie you up in my dungeon, then slip off your habeas corpus.

Don’t worry, when it comes to sex, I reject Rummy’s “quick and light.”

Gotta run to a Cabinet meeting, so I¬†hope you have a better “exit strategy” than I do.

I would say my best moment of all was when I caught a 9.5 incher. 

I will not withdraw from the missionary position, even if Barney is calling for the doggie position.

I’m the decider, and I’ll decide who goes on top.

When the final history is written on our relationship, it will look like a come-a.

The hardest part of my job is connecting my rocks to the war on terror.

Let me show you my weapon of ass destruction.

I own a dildo company?¬† That’s news to me.¬† Need some wood?

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BuzzFlash review of documentary, 9/11: Press For Truth.

Glenn Greenwald: Does Foley Prove Holy?

Madkane’s Dirty Denny.

Norm Jenson with Jon Stewart’s Dubya’s job evaluation.

Dan Kurtzman’s Best of Late-Nite Jokes, with¬†a distinct Foley aroma.¬†