[Editor's Note: Following is an excerpt from George Bush's upcoming memoir, Tuesdays with Nouri, about the President's touching conversations with Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki -- a soul who knew his time was limited, yet imparted great life lessons to the man he affectionately called "al-Dubya Flubya."  Needless to say, Bush didn't actually write this memoir, but dictated it to the literate one in his family, dog Barney]

Preface:

Unlike Mitch Albom, who had¬†his college professor Morrie, I never¬†had a mentor, since I rarely¬†attended class.¬† And just between you and me, Condi, my supposed “tutor,” knows more about the Packers and Bears¬†than international affairs.

So it was with a mixture of great excitement and trepidation that I began to visit Nouri, whose political life, if not his literal life, had a shelf-life as long as last¬†week’s milk, thanks to me and my neo-con friends.

At first, our telephone conversations were a bit formal (did you really think I was crazy enough to visit him in Baghdad?)  But we both eventually let down our guards, and these are some of the valuable lessons I learned from the great man.

Number One, “Don’t pander to religious extremists.”¬† Now, I’m not quite sure who Nouri was talking about, but he kept saying: “at least Moktada al-Sadr has nothing against stem cell research.”

Number Two, “Learn to build coalitions with your political opponents.” Now that’s easy for old Nouri to say — all he had to deal with were those Sunnis and Shiites. Let him try to make a deal with that holier-than-thou McCain. Besides, he never had to negotiate with women, like Nancy Pelosi.

Number Three, “Don’t be afraid to change course; a foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.”¬† Again, this was Nouri talking in code or something, but I know that hobgoblins are as scary as Uncle Dick yelling at me when I say I just wanna’ go home to Texas.

Just then, I heard a giant explosion on the other end of the phone, and I knew that it was finally over for my great friend and mentor.

A short time later, I received a very confusing letter from Nouri’s family. They claimed that he didn’t actually die from a bomb, but from an American¬†disease¬†called¬†ALS: Arrogance, Laziness and Stupidity.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash Review of George McGovern book: Out of Iraq: A Practical Plan for Withdrawal Now.

Crooks & Liars: Bush trashes Magna Carta.

Glenn Greenwald on Foley: Boehner and Hastert in same sinking boat.

Progressive Daily Beacon on “GOP morals.”

Dan Kurtzman collects the best of Late-Nite Foley jokes.

Lisa Casey’s October Surprise.¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†