GOP lawmakers, desperate to whip up their base for the mid-term elections, have given up hopes for a Constitutional amendment banning flag-burning, and instead are now seeking an amendment requiring the burning of The New York Times.

Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist stated in a press conference that “the American people have long since passed the point where they’re ‘fraidy-scared of Commies, or even terrorists designated as ‘No. 2′, so we need a new bogeyman to hold onto our majority.”

As justification for the GOP’s new election strategy, Frist cited a poll showing that as a threat to national security, conservatives rank the Times ahead of anthrax, botulism, and bird flu, and just slightly behind nuclear weapons.

The same poll shows, however, that while 88% of conservatives have never even laid eyes on a copy of the Times, 100% of them regularly read right-wing columnists bashing “the paper of record.”

Most surprising, however, is that Republicans are garnering some bi-partisan support for their proposal, particularly from liberal bloggers who are pissed at the Times for Judy Miller’s kiss-ass WMD coverage, and for the paper’s delay in blowing the whistle on the secret NSA spying program until after the 2004 Election.

Other elements of the liberal anti-Times coalition include people who (i) are sick of Tom Friedman’s support of the Iraqi War, (ii) don’t have the patience to finish a Sunday Frank Rich column, (iii) get angry with Maureen Dowd for writing about her own psychoses instead of those of the Bush Family, and (iv) can’t figure out what the hell happened to the paper’s weekly TV guide.

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For more on the “attack on the Old Gray Lady,” check out:

One Good Move, Media Matters, and Madkane.

And on the real Iraq, BuzzFlash interview with Nir Rosen.

All Hat No Cattle on Guantanomo ruling.