Now that we know that the Bush Administration is monitoring financial transactions the way it keeps tabs on telephone calls — without a warrant or other legal authorization — here’s a look at some of the Top Ten new promotions being offered by banks and similar financial institutions:

10. Unlimited Free “Checking-Up” — on your checking account.

9. 100% “Interest” — in all of your personal and business transactions.

8. 24-Hour access to your account through ATMs, and by ATF (Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco & Firearms).

7. Line of Dis-Credit — for innocent citizens.

6. Extensive “Teller” Services — Bank tells all to the government.

5. Mortgage your civil liberties, at 1984 rates.

4. The New “IRA” — customers treated like members of Irish Republican Army in 1970′s London.

3. “Overdraft Protection” — Account holders over draft age reported to Selective Service, to protect troop levels for Administration’s next “war of choice.”

2. Wiretaps on all wire transfers.

1. “Automatic Deposit” — of all suspicious characters straight into Gitmo.

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BLOGWORTHIES:

BuzzFlash reports on Bush Signing Statements.

One Good Move has Jon Stewart on “War Against Terror.”

Madkane Limerick on bank privacy issue.

Progressive Daily Beacon on CNN sell-out.